


A kind word and a gun

by valarmorghulis



Category: Pride and Prejudice & Related Fandoms, Pride and Prejudice (1995), Pride and Prejudice (2005), Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Darcy is a gangster, F/M, Genderswapped Jane Bennet, It's all very OOC, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-22
Updated: 2017-10-29
Packaged: 2018-05-15 14:10:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 43,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5788198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/valarmorghulis/pseuds/valarmorghulis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>William Darcy isn't a criminal. At least that is what he tries to convince Elizabeth Bennet of after he has her brother John beaten up in an alleyway. This event propelles her life into hitherto uncharted territories and drags her into a world she never before thought she'd see.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In the dark of the night

It was as if time stood still. 

”Let go of him!” Lizzie yelled as loudly as she could, but it had no effect on their attackers. Her brother, John, tried to fight off a man who had knocked him to the ground, but to no avail, the man was bigger and stronger than John was. John didn’t stand a chance. 

The second man, who was holding her arms pinned behind her back, was smaller but still too strong for her to fight off now that she had been taken by surprise. He had her pressed up against the brick wall of one of the buildings surrounding them, so she had little room to move. Finally, after what seemed like ages, she managed to twist enough to force her heel down on her attacker’s foot, making him loosen his grip on her. Just as she came loose from the grip, a car drove down the alley and Lizzie yelled again and waved her arms, hoping help had come. 

She rushed up to the car but stopped short when she saw the man that stepped out. He was tall, had dark hair with blue eyes and wore a suit cut perfectly for him. She did not need to ask him for help, the look in his eyes told her that he would not give it. She began to step back and was seized again by the man she had escaped. 

“Let him go!” She cried again, “he has done nothing to you!” She tried to wrench free, stomp on his feet, anything! But nothing helped. 

John was laying down on the ground, restrained and bleeding. Lizzie felt sick, would they do the same to her? Or would they kill her? She didn’t understand why this was happening. And how was it that no one was around to hear or see them? 

The dark-haired man had walked up to John to inspect him, but turned back to her when she spoke. He focused on the man restraining her. “Who is she? I told you to fetch me John Bennet an hour ago, not start a brawl in an alleyway.” He seemed dismayed, but not quite angry. 

The man holding her cleared his throat, “he was s’posed to be alone sir, an’ this one is makin’ such a fuss.” He shook Lizzie a little to make a point that he was holding her and couldn’t deal with John. 

The man looked at Lizzie, holding her gaze for what felt like forever. “Miss, I suggest you leave. John and I have some…business to take care of.” 

“Look, I don’t know who you are or what you want with him, but I am not going anywhere if he isn’t going with me!” Lizzie wasn’t about to leave John alone with these thugs. 

“His name is…” John coughed, “Darcy…Will..” The first man aimed a swift kick to John’s gut and John slumped down even more. 

“Take her away, for god’s sake.” Darcy instructed his man. “This is no place for a woman.” Normally Lizzie would be offended at the stereotype, but she could only see her brother and barely heard the other man. 

“No! Please, he needs a hospital. We aren’t going to tell anyone!” Darcy almost smiled but said nothing. Instead he walked over to John and sat him up to lean against the wall behind him. 

“Go on John, tell her how much you owe me.” John almost sagged back down onto the ground, but Darcy held him upright. “No, none of that, tell her!” 

John looked up at Lizzie and muttered something incoherent. “I don’t think she heard you, louder!” Darcy yelled at him. Well, it seemed like yelling, but was really a hiss. 

“Ten thousand pounds…” he managed to cough out. 

Lizzie felt sick again. How could John have been so stupid. How could he have racked up such a debt?”

Darcy turned back to Lizzie. “Unless you just happen to walk around with 10 000 pounds in your pockets… I am afraid there is nothing you can do here, Green Eyes.” He should be occupied thinking of business, but her eyes were uncommonly pretty. The rest of her had seemed ordinary at first, but when he really looked he saw something quite different from ordinary. 

Green Eyes? Lizzie thought. Well at least he didn’t know her name…

“I am feeling lenient,” he spoke to John, “I will let you off with a warning today. You have a week to come up with what you owe, otherwise there will be no more chances. Do you understand me?” 

John nodded as vigorously as he could without passing out, “yes, yes, Mr. Darcy.” 

“Good.” Those dark eyes locked onto Lizzie’s again. “As for you, Green Eyes, I do hope we meet again. Perhaps under more pleasant circumstances.” He kissed her hand, walked back to his car and drove away. His henchmen shortly followed.


	2. Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lizzie, John, Darcy and Charles all try to deal with the situation they find themselves in, on their own terms.

Lizzie’s flat. 

John hadn’t said anything on the bus from the hospital back to Lizzie’s flat. He’d been equally quiet during the walk from the bus to her flat. But as soon as Lizzie closed the flat door behind them, she made an impatient sound to draw his attention. 

“Are you going to explain or do I have to guess?” Her hands poised on her hips, she looked at him with an imploring look. She couldn’t help if he wouldn’t let her in on the problem. 

“It’s nothing, really I’ll sort it.” John waved dismissively with his hand and sat down on the sofa, leaning his head back. 

“It’s not nothing when you get beaten up in an alleyway for owing some criminal ten grand!” She could not believe how John was being so calm. 

“I just need to make a few calls; I’ll get the money together and it’ll all be over soon enough.” 

“How did you even get into that much debt? And HOW in the world did you end up owing HIM?” Lizzie still couldn’t believe this had happened to her brother, her older, responsible brother. Lizzie googled Will Darcy while she sat in the waiting room at the hospital. Hotshot businessman, but some of the less prestigious rags had published every suspicion ever had about some of his businesses. 

“I…you know I’ve been having a hard time of it lately after I got laid off and…” 

Lizzie interrupted him. “Yeah I know but that’s why you’ve been staying with me, so you can get back on your feet, WITHOUT getting into debt!” 

“I know that Lizzie, but this happened before I moved in here. I thought I could sort it, and this guy I had been seeing for a little while, he told me about Darcy. He told me that they could help. Just ‘til I got back on my feet.”

“My god John, this guy you’ve been seeing told you about Darcy? Don’t you hear how insane that sounds?” Still, if the situation was so bad, she could kind of understand. 

“He’s not like that, he wouldn’t trick me.” Charlie wouldn’t betray him like that, would he?

“If he and Darcy are such pals, how come they beat you up then huh? If he really cared about you, wouldn’t he have stopped it?”

“He can’t have known…” John tried, but began to realise himself that he sounded naïve. 

“You need to sort this out, I will help you best I can, but with just one week’s notice. John…” 

“I’m not taking your money; I can sort it. I can.” 

Lizzie wasn’t sure there was such an easy solution as John made it seem. 

 

Darcy’s office the next morning. 

 

“I want you to find out who the girl was.” Darcy sat behind his desk trying to work, but his thoughts drifted to her, the girl with the green eyes. 

“What girl?” Charlie was leaned back in his armchair in Darcy’s office, reading the paper. 

“The girl from last night who was with John Bennet, she must be his girlfriend or something.” It was incredible to him how some bum like John Bennet could snare a girl like that, but apparently, it had happened.

“You saw John last night?” Charlie put the paper down and turned towards Darcy, now actually paying attention. 

“Have you been listening to anything I’ve been saying the last 20 minutes?” 

Charlie hadn’t, he’d been too busy thinking about the coming visit from his sisters, and how he would keep Caroline from devouring Darcy. Darcy could hold his own against most women trying to schmooze him, but Caroline was such a slippery snake even Darcy had trouble. 

“No, I was thinking of something else. What were you doing with John?” He hadn’t seen John for a few weeks, a month even. He was always busy or not answering, and Charlie could take a hint. But he was still curious. 

“Liam and Henry met him after work to… remind him of his debt. There was a girl with him and I want to know who she is.” And why she was with him, but he could find that out on his own. 

“Remind him? You didn’t…” Charlie couldn’t believe Darcy would do something like that. 

“He hasn’t paid anything in three months Charlie, he needed to be reminded who he is indebted to.” 

“So you beat him up?” Charlie was getting visibly upset. 

“Not personally.” Darcy saw his friend getting a little flustered, but could hardly imagine why. “It had to be done, I don’t enjoy it, and you know that full well.”

“You know I like John, Darcy.” 

“Well you shouldn’t, he is a no-good bum and hopeless with his finances.” How could Charles have feelings for such trash. 

“He made a mistake, and he got laid off. People make mistakes Darcy, even you sometimes.”

“So call him and make sure he’s OK if you’re so worried. The girl took him to the hospital I believe, and at the same time you can ask who she was.” 

Charlie sighed. He would call John, he just wasn’t sure the man would pick up, especially now. “What did she look like?”

“She was beautiful, long dark hair and eyes that were green, but with dark rims somehow. I’ve never seen anyone like her. She probably wanted to kill me, but the fire in her. Charlie, you should have seen it. She broke Liam’s little toe with her heel.” Darcy was a little impressed. Scratch that, he was really impressed. 

Lizzie. Charlie had no doubt. 

“Did you beat up John in front of her?” He asked. 

Silence. “Yes.” Still, not personally. 

“Then you can forget her.” Charlie returned to his newspaper. 

“Do you know who she is?”

“His sister, Lizzie.” 

 

Two days passed, leaving five more days until John had to pay Darcy ten grand. Lizzie hadn’t really seen John around much, but she was pretty sure he hadn’t been able to get the money yet. With no job, he had very limited unemployment money to live on. If he were to get it, it wouldn’t be any way legal. 

She couldn’t stop thinking about it, and she couldn’t get involved. She was studying law in her spare time for goodness sake. But she couldn’t leave her brother alone in this. It was an incredibly frustrating situation. 

She was angry too. She was angry with John for getting into bed with these people, and angry with Darcy for letting him. She wasn’t really surprised about Darcy; she had studied up on him lately. Always in some top 10 list or other, in business magazines and in the late-night rags being connected to this or that crime. He seemed like a real piece of work. And the guy John had been involved with, Charlie, she didn’t even have words for. She had made John promise not to get back into it with Charlie, but she wasn’t sure he could keep it. 

Lizzie had been so lost in thought that she had missed her stop and had to walk for 10 extra minutes to get to class. This meant that she was five minutes late, and that usually wouldn’t go unnoticed by her classmates. They were all so very punctual. Today however, her professor was late. That never happened, ever. 

When professor Dixon finally showed up, she was visibly stressed and she was followed by none other than the object of her thoughts for the last couple of days, Darcy. What. The. Fuck. 

“Class, today we have a guest speaker who will talk to you about cause of action; Mr. William Darcy.” The professor didn’t seem all too happy to have the businessman in her classroom. Lizzie could imagine why. Had he strong-armed her into letting him speak in her class? No, not even he would be so…uncouth, right?

Darcy talked for half an hour until it was time for a fifteen-minute break. He had not caught her gaze once, and she hoped it was simply a coincidence that he was in her class. Hope was, after all, the last thing to die. 

Almost all students left the classroom for coffee, but she stayed put, thinking it would be safest; surely he wouldn’t approach her in here. Out there, he could corner her anywhere. 

She was wrong. 

He walked past her and sat down in the row behind her. “Green eyes, we meet again.” 

“What do you want?” She gripped a pen, not sure what she could do to him with it, but she had nothing else. She turned slightly towards him, just to make sure she didn’t miss anything. 

“Relax.” He put his hand over hers, making her let go of the pen. “I am not going to hurt you.” Liar, she thought. 

“Why don’t I believe you?” Her heart was pounding so hard she was sure he could hear it. Calm down damn it; he can’t do anything to you here. Except threaten you, he can do that. 

“Listen, it was unfortunate that you had to witness what happened with John, and I don’t expect you to understand. But, I would like to explain anyway, if you’d let me.” 

He was too close for comfort, leaning towards her; she could almost feel his breath on her neck. “Why are you here? Really.”

“Well, it isn’t every day that I meet someone like you, I wanted to find out who you are.” 

“So you force my professor to let you come here? Why? And how the hell did you know I’d be here?” Someone like her? What did that mean?

“You do ask a lot of questions. I want to know you, who you are.” 

“Well, that is never going to happen.” Lizzie stood as the room began to fill up again, grabbed her bag, and left. 

 

John sat at the same café he and Lizzie had been to before they were attacked in the alleyway. This time, he was waiting for someone else. Outside the rain was pouring, and several people ducked into the small establishment hunched under umbrellas and into raincoats. 

Just after the waitress dropped off his tea, a blonde man took a seat opposite him. John felt both excited and terrified. He had no idea how involved Charlie had been in getting him beaten up. Maybe Charlie had been the instigator after John stopped answering his calls. Or maybe, and this was the theory John was hoping for, Charlie had had no idea what Darcy had been planning. 

“John,” Charlie began, a little breathless. “I’m so glad you’re alright, when I heard, well I was shocked. And very concerned, but considering you hadn’t answered any of my calls lately, I didn’t know if I should try again. I was really happy you called.” He was rambling, he knew, but he wanted John to understand that he’d had nothing to do with the attack, that he wouldn’t do something like that. 

John didn’t know what to say. He was partly relieved and partly suspicious. Charlie could be lying after all. He never seemed like the conniving type, but he had had part in getting John into this mess. He was a friend of Darcy’s and maybe they were even in business together. Lizzie’s words stuck with him, to not contact Charlie, too late for that, but also to not trust Charlie. For the two days it had taken John to make the call, the seed of doubt had taken root and grown. 

“Charles.” John said solemnly. “I apologize for my absence; you know I’ve had a hard time lately and it all just got too much.”

“I understand John, I just wish you would have talked to me.”

“I know…and that is why I asked you to meet me here. I wanted to say a final goodbye.”

“What? Why?” Stupid question, but he couldn’t help it. 

“I realise the type of loan you got me was shady, but I guess I just didn’t realise the severity. And I can’t be around it. When I’ve paid off Darcy, I can’t see either of you again.”

“Oh, I see.” Charlie played a little with a toothpick from the table’s condiment container. “I must have read things wrong, or you think I was somehow involved in your attack.”

This made John nervous, because if Charlie was involved, and John confirmed his suspicion, things could get more out of hand. Lie it is. “I don’t think that, but being with you would put me in the path of Darcy, and I don’t want anything to do with him.”

“So how will you find the money in time?” Abrupt change of topic, but not unwelcome. 

“I don’t know yet, but I have a couple of ideas.”

“Legal?”

“Hardly, I wish they were, but it’s too short an amount of time.”

“Look, I feel responsible for getting you in this mess, why don’t you let me pay off Darcy and you can pay me back whenever.” 

“Vague loan conditions like that landed me in this, not you. I can’t accept that, Charles.”

“So what are you going to do? Rob a bank?”


	3. We got us

Day 3. Four days left. 

“I could just pay the money, Darcy. This is my fault after all.” Charles hadn’t been able to sleep that night. John had left for good and it was all Charles’ fault. Outside it was pouring, and Charles was dripping all over Darcy’s hardwood floors. 

“It won’t teach him anything, he made the choice. No matter what he tells himself, he knew what he was getting himself into.” Darcy couldn’t risk letting anyone of the hook for a debt. If it got out that he was getting soft things could turn bad fast. 

“I still want to get him out of it. There is no other way he’ll consider seeing me again.”

“I thought you said he was done with you after this is all finished.” 

“Yeah…but if I just fix it…”

“No Charles. Take the hint, he’s over it, now you get over it too.” Darcy snapped at his best friend. Charles needed a reality check. John was no good trash and Charles needed to realise that he couldn’t keep falling in love with just a pretty face. 

“What has turned you into such a Grinch today?” Darcy had never snapped at him before, ever. 

Darcy contemplated not telling Charles about Lizzie. He needed to talk to someone, and Georgie was still away. She would have understood; she would have made sense of this. But he couldn’t disturb her with that kind of talk yet. He wasn’t sure she could handle it. And so, he told Charlie about his staged run-in with Elizabeth Bennet. 

“Soo…” Charlie began after being quiet for a minute. “You have a thing for Lizzie Bennet and she rejected you. Sounds awfully familiar. What was your advice to me again? Get over it?” Charlie shook his head. Darcy thought Charlie was the blind one, but he knew exactly who John was. Darcy didn’t know Lizzie at all, and even though it might be interesting to see her tear Darcy to shreds, Charlie didn’t wish the heartache on his friend, no matter how stupid he was being. 

“It’s not nearly the same thing.” Lizzie may be related to John, but she was a sensible girl. 

“It is nearly the same thing. Only yours is worse. What did you expect would happen? She’d look into those deep baby blues and forget you beat up her brother?” Charles’ tone was bordering on catty, something that was wholly unlike his character. 

“I don’t know…god damn it Charles, I’ve never had this kind of problem before.” How was it that three days ago, Darcy couldn’t care less about the women he encountered from all corners of his life, but a few minutes in the company of Elizabeth Bennet, and not an hour passed without her entering his mind. 

“Well, thankfully, this weekend Caroline will be coming to visit.” Charlie almost managed to sound sincere, almost. “I’m sure she’ll be more than willing to help you forget aaaall about Lizzie Bennet.”

“Don’t even joke about that, god.” And as for forgetting Lizzie Bennet, well, if Darcy had never before faced an impossible task, he had now. 

 

“Lizzie, hello? Earth to Lizzie!” Charlotte tapped her best friend on the head with a pencil and watched her snap back into reality. 

“I’m sorry, what were you saying?” Lizzie was thinking about John, again. There had to be something she could do. 

“I was saying, graduation is coming up soon and we need to plan a bash to give studying a proper send-off!” 

“Right, yeah…But it’s like four months away, I think we’ll have time to plan.”

“It doesn’t hurt to prepare. I’m thinking dinner with the families after the ceremony, then home to get clothes and other essentials, bring back here to get ready and go out for drinks at the Lodge.”

“Isn’t it a bit weird to go out to your family’s pub?”

“The parents have promised not to hang around, or have the staff report the goings on of the evening. It’ll be chill AND the biggest perk, free drinks for me and you.”

“No seriously Char, I can’t let your parents pay for my drinks.”

“Yes you can. They seriously overprice those things anyway. And how much don’t you think we lose every time Maria is convinced she’ll be great at flairing and drops a bottle of rum?”

“Yeah, alright fine, thank you.” Charlotte had taken Lizzie under her wing the first day of university and they had been best friend ever since. It never mattered that Char’s dad was a nobleman or that she had more money than she could spend while Lizzie struggled to pay rent. 

“Don’t mention it.” Lizzie gave her a tired smile. “No, seriously don’t, especially to Lydia or we’ll have a bit of a crisis on our hands and we don’t want that again.”

“No, god, don’t remind me. What the hell is wrong with my family lately?” The Lydia debacle of 2016 had occurred only two months earlier, but that is a story for another day. 

“You mean John?” Charlotte figured it was something with John that made Lizzie look wrecked. 

“I just don’t know where he’s at lately. We used to be so close, but just these last few days it seems like we’ve become estranged and neither of us will admit it.”

“Estranged, please. You and John may have a falling out here or there, but you will never be estranged. You’re just too closely connected for that to even be a remote possibility, which it isn’t.”

“I just don’t feel like I know him as well as I thought I did.”

“I don’t know what you aren’t telling me, and I’m sure you will when you are ready, but whatever it is isn’t going to get better by you making it bigger in your head than it is in reality.”

“It’s not my place to say or I would tell you, but I can say, it is pretty huge in reality too.”


	4. I'm coming over

Day four – three days left

Lizzie was still only seeing John early mornings or late nights and it worried her to no end. She had a nagging feeling that since he wouldn’t tell her what he was doing, it was very much illegal. She couldn’t really be mad at John for not involving her though. She knew that the reason he would not tell her, was not because he thought she would turn him in, but because he didn’t want to drag her further into his mess than she already was. 

Day five – two days left

Lizzie made a decision. While John was passed out on the sofa after coming home at seven in the morning, she swiped his phone and got two numbers from it. 

Both calls would be hard for her to make, because they both involved her swallowing her pride. If, however, the first one panned out, she wouldn’t have to make the second one. 

She put her coat and shoes on, grabbed her car keys from the bowl on the dresser in the hallway and made her way outside to her car. She didn’t want to risk John waking up and overhearing the conversation. Two signals went through before the line was picked up on the other side. 

“Who’s this?” A voice answered.

“It’s Lizzie. I need to speak with you.”

 

Lizzie pulled her car over at the curb where the blonde man was waiting for her. She gestured for him to get in, and barely waited for him to put his belt on before pulling back out into traffic. 

“So I can imagine what this is about, but I’m not sure how I can help you.” Charlie began carefully. 

“If you ever cared for my brother at all, you would want to help him out of this mess you helped him get himself into.” Lizzie’s patience for Charlie was below zero even before he got in the car. 

“Of course I do, but you should know, I’ve already spoken to both John and Darcy. John doesn’t want to see me and he won’t let me give him the money.” There went Lizzie’s first idea. “And Darcy won’t let me pay him directly, saying John won’t learn that way.” Second idea out the window, she was going to have to make the second call. 

“Then I propose a third option. Lend me the money, I’ll give it to John or pay Darcy myself.”

“I would, in a heartbeat. But John will know where you got it and he won’t accept it from you.” He was about to say that Darcy would be the same, but suddenly he wasn’t so sure. “Darcy, however, might take it. I can’t be exactly sure, but I think whatever thing it is he has for you might be enough to sway him.”

Lizzie wasn’t sure what she should say to that. “Thing?” She asked incredulously. 

“What, you think it was a coincidence he showed up at your class?” She wore a chocked expression. Of course it wasn’t, it was to intimidate her into silence. “Yes, he told me about that little lapse in judgement. Also, I can tell by the fact that John suddenly had seven days to pay up. No one gets seven days, ever. The only reason I can think of is that he somehow thought it would put him a little more in your good graces.”

Lizzie snorted at that. Put him in her good graces? He could have started by not beating up her brother. This was good though. The problem was, Lizzie didn’t think Darcy would go along with her plan if she stonewalled him, no matter what kind of a thing he had for her. She was going to have to be pleasant to him, smile and hope for the best. Problem was, it wasn’t in Lizzie’s nature to be deceitful. And she couldn’t lie to save her skin, but now it was John’s skin, wasn’t it?

Thanks to the damn great app Swish, Lizzie and Charlie parted ways with ten thousand pounds having changed ownership. Now though, it was time for that second call. 

This time only one signal went through before a woman answered. “Darcy offices, how can I help you?” Must be his secretary. “I…um, I would like to speak to Mr. Darcy please.” She barely got the words out, her nerves almost getting the better of her. 

“And who may I ask is calling?” The woman’s tone was calm and pleasant; seeming almost unreal in this strange world Lizzie had suddenly found herself in. 

Breathe Lizzie. You are stronger than this. William Darcy is nothing but a criminal and, if you believe Charlie, he won’t hurt you, she thought to herself before responding. 

“Elizabeth Bennet. He will want to speak with me.” 

 

Darcy’s intercom sounded with the voice of his assistant. “Mr. Darcy, a Miss Bennet is on the phone asking to speak with you.”

Suddenly the spreadsheets in his hands were forgotten and he responded. “Patch her through, and for future reference, always patch her through directly.” His stomach made an uncontrollable leap, but settled soon again. 

“Of course, Mr. Darcy.” Mrs. Reynolds smiled to herself. Had her dear boy finally found a girl worth his time?

Darcy didn’t want anyone to accidentally overhear, so he picked up the phone and placed it to his ear. “Elizabeth?” He began. 

“Darcy. I was wondering if you had time to see me, today.” She got straight to the point, no use dancing around it. 

“Well, I am rather busy actually.” If she wanted something from him, he wasn’t going to fall to his knees and give it to her just yet. That would be ridiculous. “What is it about?” 

Insufferable man. “You know what it’s about, and as you know it is kind of time sensitive.” Why did he have to make this difficult? He must know how much it was taking for her to call him like this. 

“Yes, well. Come by my office, I’ll be here for the next two hours. After that I am going to dinner. If you can’t make it before then, you are welcome to join me.”

“I will be there in half an hour.” She hung up without saying goodbye. He hadn’t thought that she would take him up on the offer but there had still been a small vain hope. 

Twenty-five minutes had passed since she hung up the phone on him. This would only be the third time he met her, but somehow it felt like they had known each other a whole lot longer than that. He had half expected her to turn up in the college sweatshirt and baggy jeans she had worn to class, but he was so very wrong. He saw her as soon as she hit the reception desk on his floor. Her hair hung loose about her shoulders, reaching just down past her shoulder blades. When she turned towards his office, being pointed out by the receptionist, he could take her in fully. She wore a silky blue blouse underneath a sharp black blazer. Her legs were covered in tight dark blue trousers with black stripes down the sides, ending at her ankles where black leather boots took over. She was a vision. Then her searching gaze caught his across the room, and she strode purposefully towards his office. 

She didn’t bother knocking. They had held eye contact the whole walk from the reception to his office through the glass walls that surrounded it. He stood when she entered, not sure how he should greet her. She solved that for him by simply saying “Darcy” and sitting down before he could round his desk. 

“Elizabeth…Well, I suppose I will let you begin.” He had so many things he wanted to say to her, but he assumed she didn’t want to hear them. 

“I…” She began hesitantly. Come on, act for goodness sake, how hard can it be? 

Very hard, it turns out. “I...” Again, she couldn’t get any proper words out. Damn it all to hell. 

“Yes?” He leaned forward, looking positively enigmatic. 

“I want to pay the debt. I have the money.” There, it was out, now all he had to do was take it. 

“No you don’t.” This was an interesting twist though. How had she planned to follow this through?

What did he mean No? 

“Yes I do!” What was his deal?

“You didn’t yesterday. The total amount of liquid assets in the name of Elizabeth Bennet this time yesterday was 453 pounds and 34 pennies. Not in any way near ten thousand pounds. So unless you are magic…”

“What, how…?” She didn’t bother finishing that, because she wasn’t really surprised if she was being honest. “Check again.” She held his gaze, defying him. 

“What?”

“I said, check again, you obviously have some way to check my bank balance, so check again.”

And so he did. She could spot the very moment he saw that her account indeed had another ten thousand pounds in it. 

“How?” He asked. Slightly irritated now. 

“Doesn’t matter. Do you want to get paid or don’t you?” He could hardly deny her now. 

“What did you do to get that kind of cash? Tell me right now.” He had gone from slightly irritated to straight up angry. 

“It doesn’t m…” She couldn’t finish the sentence; Darcy was looking down right furious. 

“Elizabeth…you will tell me right now what you did to get that kind of money. Who do you owe now? This isn’t a fucking game.” How could she be so stupid, and it was entirely his fault. 

“Why would you care?” She didn’t understand this reaction. Why would he be mad about getting the money he was owed, what did he care where it came from? She figured John would still learn his lesson when his sister now had a debt instead of him. 

Darcy seemed to have simmered down a little, but not completely. “From now on, just assume I care.” He walked around his desk and at the same time the glass around his office tinted so no one could see in. He sat down in the chair next to her and turned to face her without the desk between them. “Please, Elizabeth, tell me where it comes from.” She could still see the anger residing within him, but he kept a lid on it now. 

“It’s nothing like what you’re thinking okay, Charlie gave it to me.” Damn he’s intense. She had to confess to diffuse the situation. 

Darcy took a breath. Good, Charles he could deal with easily. No matter who it had been he could deal with it easily, but only if he knew whom it was he had to deal with.

“Charles…well, not ideal that he went behind my back and against my specific wishes, but it could have been worse.”

“He only wanted to help. And I reached out to him, not the other way around.” 

“You should have come to me directly. I would think you’d have learned a lesson about taking money from strangers.” He knew he had put her in a position that made her dependent on him, but he hadn’t intended for it to be that way. John was supposed to solve this himself, not drag his sister down with him. But somehow, Lizzie had taken it upon herself to save John, and it put Darcy in a difficult position. 

“Why? I had nothing to offer you and two days left gave me little choice. I know John is up to something illegal and I need to make him stop before he gets into worse trouble.”

“Why won’t you just let him sort things out by himself?” 

“Because he’s my brother! What kind of sister would I be if I knew about this mess but just left him in it? What kind of person would that make me? He could go to jail, or worse!” 

He knew the “worse” bit was meant for him. She didn’t think he could understand, but he had a sister that he would move the world for. He could understand. He had just always seen it as the brother’s role to protect his sister, not the other way around. 

“Fine, I’ll take the money. And I will give it back to Charles. Then I consider this business finished. You can tell John that he is free.” Darcy concluded. He couldn’t have Lizzie owe that kind of money; she would never be able to pay it back in time. 

“I…thanks, I guess. I’ll call John right now.” She pulled out her phone and dialled. No answer. She tried again, same result. “I guess I’ll tell him when he rolls in again tomorrow morning.”

“No, you need to tell him today.” 

What was he on about? “Why is that?”

“I realise you are not of a criminal or deceitful mindset, but considering he thinks he has to produce the money in two days’ time, don’t you think that whatever it is he is doing to get it is going down tonight. If you want him to get out of it, you’ll need to reach him now.”

“Fucking shit!” Darcy flinched at her sudden outburst, but it made him smile slightly. He didn’t think that kind of language could come out of her. “Fuck Darcy, how am I supposed to do that when he isn’t picking up?” 

“Let me try something.” He pulled out his phone and called Charlie, putting it on speaker and held it out between them so Lizzie could hear as well. “Darcy, I can imagine why you are calling…” Charlie began, but Darcy cut him off. “Charles, I will have a serious talk with you about going behind my back, but right now I need you to tell us what it is John is doing to get the money.”

“Us? Why would you think I know? Is Lizzie there with you? Hey Lizzie!” Charles tried, but Darcy was having none of it. “I know you know, spill the proverbial fucking beans Charles!”

“Charlie, please.” Lizzie said. “John is going to do something stupid and I need to stop him before this gets out of hand.” 

“So I take it you two have resolved things?” He sounded a little smug, this was serious damn it!

“Close enough.” Lizzie admitted. 

“Well, you don’t have to worry about John. He was going to do something stupid, but luckily he was dealing with unprofessional thugs and it fell through. If it didn’t solve itself by tomorrow, he was going on the run. He came here about 20 minutes ago and asked for the money I offered him, but I told him I had given it to you, so he is probably headed to you as we speak.” Lizzie sighed with relief, but Darcy just looked pissed. 

“Thank god, I’ll go out to meet him, thank you Charlie.” 

Darcy pressed the red button to end the call, but caught Lizzie’s wrist as she made to stand. “Sit down, please.” 

She stood anyway. He stood along with her, still holding her wrist. 

“Darcy, I am not going to thank you for this, because if it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have had to go through this, frankly hellish, week. And neither would John. I will never put anything ahead of him, ever. And you, you…you made me almost lose faith in this world, made me think I would lose my brother, and for what? Fucking money!”

“Lizzie please…I never wanted for you to be involved in any of this. I never thought…”

“That’s right, you didn’t think, did you. Didn’t think how your fucking shit would affect others. God, I hope I never see you again.” 

With those parting words, Elizabeth Bennet walked out of William Darcy’s office and left him behind, utterly bewildered.


	5. Graduation

Days went by, and then weeks and months without so much as a word about the insane week that had changed Lizzie’s life. John avoided the subject, and not that Lizzie wanted to talk about it all the time, but she figured it would come up from time to time. When she did bring it up he simply waved it off with a “that’s all over with thanks to you, Lizzie.” 

John had thankfully gotten a job as an assistant to an editor at a pretty decent newspaper and was making enough that he put away a little every month. He planned to surprise Lizzie with something nice for just the two of them. Something as a way to get things back on even keel. She had always wanted to go to Rome, and he planned to take her there in the fall as a thank you. 

Lizzie’s workload was easing up as graduation was quickly approaching and she applied for work over the summer everywhere she could find. Charlotte had already scored an internship at a law firm thanks to her dad, and Lizzie was starting to sweat over not finding anything. One more month until graduation and she felt like she was in some kind of limbo. She suddenly knew about this whole other world that was happening around her that she hadn’t given a thought to before. 

She found herself wondering what poor people William Darcy’s thugs were harassing, what girls he was making advances on, and why the hell she was even thinking about him at all. She desperately wanted to wipe him from her mind, but he just wouldn’t go away. This confusion on top of the terrifying thought of graduating without a job lined up made her slightly nauseous. 

 

William Darcy had forced himself to stay away from Elizabeth Bennet since she had walked out of his office a few months ago. She didn’t want anything to do with him, while he wanted everything to do with her. How the hell had he managed to find himself in this situation? His cousin Richard kept telling him how he could have any woman he wanted. But of course, the only woman he wanted did not under any circumstances want him. 

Charles obnoxious sister Caroline had visited shortly after he saw Elizabeth last and made it quite clear that he could have her should he wish it. She had also gone out of her way to make him wish it. Darcy figured it was something like her biological clock ticking along with her need to secure his fortune. From what his sister had told him when he talked to her about Caroline after the visit, Caroline’s modelling career was slowly turning downhill, and she needed a cushion to land on. 

Darcy had never in his life met such an obvious gold digger, and yet, when he had had a little too much to drink, Caroline actually seemed like a viable option. It was sad really, for objectively, Caroline had everything going for her except her personality. Elizabeth would never have him, and no other woman had ever interested him. It was like his life felt a little emptier than it had before he had met Elizabeth Bennet. An emptiness he longed to fill with something. It was amazing to him how someone he had only known over the course of a week had made such an impact on his life. 

He’d never admit to it, but he was also sympathizing with Charles. Darcy didn’t know John well, but if he held the same allure for Charles that Elizabeth did for him, they were both screwed. 

He could always try to pursue her. He knew where she lived; he had her phone number, her schedule and her banking information. Basically, he had the potential to be the creepiest stalker ever. The more he thought about it, the less insane it sounded. Just bump into her once more, and see how she reacts. Maybe time has given her the opportunity to cool off. Maybe. 

 

Graduation day came and went. Lizzie still didn’t have a job, but she did have an interview lined up for a week from now. Not some summer job either, a proper job at a proper law firm. 

That evening it was time for the last hurrah, the party at the lodge that Charlotte had planned for months. Lizzie’s plan was to get heroically sloshed and pick up a guy, preferably a cute one. One that did not have dark hair and blue eyes. Does the combination light hair and dark eyes exist? 

After dinner in the city with John, Lydia and her parents, Lizzie set her course for Lucas’ Lodge. The place wasn’t jam-packed just yet, it was only nine in the evening, but Lizzie had promised to pre-game with Charlotte and a few other ex-students from their class. As the night progressed, Lizzie could feel herself becoming less and less coherent. Usually she took it as a sign to switch the vodka for water, but not tonight. It was her graduation for crying out loud, and she had stress to get out of her system. Knocking back one more glass of vodka, she joined the throng of people on the dancefloor and didn’t leave until Charlotte pulled her out and wanted to go home. Lizzie had been busy dancing with a pretty blonde boy and wasn’t all to grateful for the interruption. 

“I want to go home Lizzie; Colin is being a huge pain and I’m tired.” Charlotte whined when Lizzie protested the interruption of her dancing. Colin, Charlotte’s on again off again boyfriend, now in the off-stage, had shown up without warning. So, Lizzie acquiesced with one backwards glance at the blonde boy and let Charlotte drag her towards the coat room. 

 

Just when Lizzie and Charlotte turned into the narrow street that led from the club to the main road, they spotted two men in front of them. The men were clearly intoxicated if not high, wobbling about and shouting nonsense at each other. The men did not seem to notice the two women until they were about to pass each other by. 

“Hey there little darlings, fancy some company!?” One of the men grabbed Charlotte’s coat sleeve and slurred at her. She tried to jerk her arm free and keep walking, but the other man moved in front of them. 

“Come now, just a little bit o’ fun!” He leered. Charlotte looked disgusted and tried to get past without engaging with the drunkards. 

“Let her go and leave us alone!” Lizzie hissed at him, but to no avail. The two men kept up their harassment for what felt like forever, but it was probably not even for a minute. They only stopped when Lizzie felt a hand on her shoulder. At that very same moment both men froze for a second only to turn the next and make their way from the street. 

“Do you have a thing for trouble in dark streets at night, Elizabeth?” That voice again. His hand did not move. Lizzie spun around and slapped Darcy across the cheek, hard. 

Charlotte was speechless. An incredibly attractive man had just helped them out of a really uncomfortable situation, and Lizzie was hitting him? Beyond confusing. Maybe Lizzie was beyond drunk. 

“Don’t ever touch me again!” Lizzie growled, emotions were running high and she felt robbed of her night of freedom. 

“I am just trying to help you, Lizzie.” He kept calm, but a little annoyance slipped through in his voice. 

“Don’t, I don’t want nor need anything from you!” She took a deep breath. “And don’t call me Lizzie.” 

“Lizzie!” Charlotte couldn’t believe how rude her friend was being. “I’m sorry, Mr…?” 

“William, please. William Darcy.” Darcy shook Charlottes hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet a friend of Lizzie’s.”

“Charlotte Lucas.” Charlotte fanned herself when Darcy looked away from her to Lizzie. “I am sorry about her; she is a little overwhelmed I think.” 

“I am not overwhelmed. He knows exactly why I don’t like him, and he has brought it on himself. Can we go now Char?” 

“Actually, could I speak with you for a moment Elizabeth? Please.” Darcy lightly touched Lizzie’s arm, and earned a glare in return.

Lizzie was about to protest when Charlotte intervened. “How about I wait for you at the bus stop?” She didn’t wait for a response and left. Thanks for that Charlotte. 

“She’s nice,” Darcy remarked. Lizzie rolled her eyes. 

“Yes, really nice to leave me alone with a criminal, just what I wish for.” Damn it Charlotte, not OK. 

“I am not a criminal.” He wasn’t offended at the accusation, just stating the fact. 

“Yes, you are. You may not get your hands dirty, but I know enough about you, mister gangster.” Okay, she was still sloshed. She jabbed him in the chest with her finger and cursed when she hit hard muscle. “Fuck ow!”

“You say ow? I’m the one who got stabbed by a nail. Lizzie, are you OK? You seem a little drunk.” He reached out to steady her as she wobbled, getting ready to steer her towards his car. 

“I should stab you with something worse, you’ve earned it.”

“And why is that, because I let your brother’s debt to me go, taking a 10 000 pound loss?” 

“Because you had hooligans hold me down in an alley and beat up my brother! Or because you seem to be stalking me now even after I have repeatedly asked you to leave me the fuck alone!”

“Yes well…you were not supposed to be there, no harm was intended for you, and I really am sorry that you were involved.” He had held her gaze for a long time now, and she broke it by turning away and beginning to walk to the bus stop. He reached out and took hold of her arm.

“What did I say before?” She hissed, and he knew he should just let it go, let her go. But something in him simply couldn’t. Not yet. She was too important, too…valuable. 

“You aren’t giving me a chance to explain what happened, how am I supposed to turn your opinion of me if you keep turning me your back?”

“I don’t care what you want or what you do. Just leave me out of it.”

“Well, that is where I cannot obey you. Please let me drive you home, you are in no state to go on public transport.”

“Don’t give me that crap, why won’t you leave me be?” How is this happening to her? Why couldn’t a normal person stalk her? “This is really stalkerish behaviour, Darcy!”

“You know, if I had any intention to stalk you I wouldn’t have stayed away for four months. John let it slip that you would be here, and I just wanted to make sure you got home safe.” He took her hand, trying to make her look at him again. “I know I’m coming on strong right now, and I apologize, but I will not let you walk out into the night in the state you are in.”

“You will just have to stop, the only thing we have in common is John, and I surely hope his business with you is finished. As for anything else, it is all in your head.” She turned him her back. “Also, I am perfectly capable of riding the bus just as I have done all my life.” 

“How you feel about me or how I feel about you is not really relevant right now. We can talk about that when you are sober. Right now, I suggest we find your friend and get both of you home safe.”

“Look, Darcy, I don’t know why you would take it upon yourself to make sure I got home safe, but your assistance isn’t needed alright. I’m taking the bus now.” Then something he had said took root. “Wait, did you just say JOHN told you I’d be here? When did you see John?”

Busted. “Earlier today, he was at Charles’ house when I stopped by. I asked him how you were and he explained you were celebrating your graduation here tonight. He doesn’t know I’m here.”

“He’s with Charlie? They’re back together?” 

“I’m not sure, I didn’t ask.” 

“Right…so you just decided to show up?” 

“Would you have picked up if I had called?” 

“Well I don’t have your cell number so probably, but I also might have hung up on you.” 

“I just had this nagging feeling. My sister, she, on the night of her graduation from school, she was attacked by her ex, and I wasn’t there to pick her up. I was too late. And then I come here and see those drunks harass you.” They stood silent for a moment just looking at each other, both breathing quite heavily. Lizzie couldn’t grasp why he was even still in her life, and Darcy was too frustrated to have an argument with her while she was drunk. 

Lizzie came to the conclusion that she was too drunk still to have any kind of conversation with him that didn’t involve shouting and blaming him for everything wrong in her life. Him acting like a human with feelings wasn’t something she could handle right now. “I’m sorry about your sister, but I’m not her, and I’m not your responsibility. But…thanks, I guess, for the concern.” She put her palm flat on his chest as sort of a friendly goodbye. 

He wanted to kiss her so badly, to show her how much he cared. But she was too drunk to consent, and he didn’t think she would even if she were sober. 

“If you will not let me drive you, then you will take a taxi with your friend.” He walked behind her up to the main street and hailed a taxi for them. As the women climbed in the back, he handed the driver one hundred pounds. “Make sure they both get inside safely.”

He remained for a moment while the taxi drove away, wondering if his life could ever go back to normal after having met her.


	6. The first day of the rest of your life

Hurrying down the busy London streets, Lizzie kept looking at signs and the slip of paper in her hand. Trying to find the offices of her hopefully future employer was easier said than done. As someone who hardly ever visits this part of the city, she felt like a fish out of water. Also, if she didn’t find her way soon, she would be late for her interview. 

Darcy stepped out of the coffee shop across the street from his office building. He stood for a moment in the rare sun, sipping his latte. Suddenly, that latte was on the pavement. 

“I am so sorry sir, please forgive me…” Lizzie began apologising to the poor man she had run into and whose coffee she had spilled, until she saw who it was. How is it possible that she would run into him here, on her big day, and when she was lost. She needed help; directions, something, and he could help her. 

“Well, as I live and breathe; Elizabeth Bennet, apologising to me. Must be my lucky day.” Seeing her again so soon, only a week or so since he saw her last…it was refreshing. But she looked stressed, or maybe it was just her reaction to seeing him. 

Her thoughts were at war. Half of them wanted to turn around and leave, but the other knew that he could help her. “Darcy, I can’t say that it’s good to see you, but I need you to help me.” Get it out, before you back out. 

“Anything for you.” He smiled, a rarity, she’d only seen his smile once before. 

“I need to find this building.” She showed him the address on the slip of paper. He smiled and nodded. 

“You’ve found it.” He pointed across the street. The building she was looking for was right next to his office. He was pretty sure he knew where she was supposed to be. 

“Oh thank goodness. I’m about to be late for this interview…” She began talking, but then remembered whom she was with. He didn’t care, and he didn’t need to. 

“Go,” he smiled again. “And good luck.” Two smiles in the same conversation must be some kind of record for him. Lizzie ran across the street and entered the building. Darcy hung back for a moment, getting another latte, and then followed her. He hadn’t seen Richard in a while; it felt like the right time to pay a visit to his cousin. 

 

“You can go in now miss,” the assistant looked up at her from her desk, and waved towards a corridor of offices. “The last one.”

“Thanks…” Lizzie had made it just in time for her 10 o’clock appointment, and it was now 10:20. She knew interviews ran on their own schedules, but having had to ask Darcy for help to make it in time had annoyed her, and now it was for no good reason. She would have found the building in another five minutes or so without asking him. 

The office she entered was spacious and light, occupied by a smiling blond man with very agreeable manners. 

“Good day Miss Bennet, I do apologise for keeping you waiting, it has been quite the morning here.” He smiled and shook her hand, then indicating for her to take a seat on a sofa. He himself occupied the opposite chair. 

“I am Richard Fitzwilliam, Senior Partner.” He introduced himself, but they both knew she already knew. He filled her in on details about the position, asked questions about her here and there, but mostly kept it casual. It was the most stress-free interview she had ever had. “As you can imagine there are quite a few candidates for this position…”

“Yes I know, and I am confident I can do this job well. It feels…right.”

Outside the office, Darcy was having a little chat with Richard’s assistant, who indicated the interview was probably almost over. He knew Lizzie wouldn’t want his help, but he also knew that Richard would value his opinion, and if that weren’t enough, Richard wouldn’t have a problem doing him a favour. 

He knocked on the door, interrupting Richard and Lizzie laughing about something, and since Richard saw through the glass door who it was, indicated for him to enter. 

“Will! Long time, no see!” He got up and clasped hands with his cousin, a big smile on his face. “I must introduce you to this wonderful young woman, miss Elizabeth Bennet. She has a bright future ahead of her.”

“Yes, we have in fact met before. Lovely to see you again Miss Bennet.” Darcy suddenly felt like it had been a big mistake coming here. If she knew about his connection with Richard, she might not take the job. He could have ruined it for her. 

“Mr Darcy.” Lizzie said, pleasantly civil but no more. 

“Just before you knocked, I was offering her the job as my junior associate. She has yet to accept though.” 

Shit shit shit, you’ve ruined it now Darcy. 

“Of course I was just about to accept! Thank you so very much for this opportunity Mr. Fitzwilliam, I look forward to working here.” She took her leave of Richard and stepped out of the office. Darcy didn’t follow but stayed behind to speak with his cousin. 

 

“So, Will, how is it you know our miss Bennet?” 

“She got involved in a disagreement I had with her brother.” 

“Disagreement?” Richard could guess, but wanted to know what kind of baggage he could expect with his new employee. 

“He owed me money. She got in the way, it’s nothing more.” 

Richard took a moment to study his cousin, who was picking on the armrest of his chair. “It’s just that you acted differently around her. Almost…nervous.” Richard didn’t get many chances to tease his cousin; the man was almost untouchable in that sense. 

“You’re hallucinating, Richard.”

“You sure? She’s quite beautiful and very smart, I wouldn’t be surprised…”

“I know all that,” Darcy cut him off and then turned the questions on his cousin. “Are you interested in her?” If his amiable cousin was going to be his rival, he stood an even worse chance. 

“Me? I only just met her, but as I said, she’s quite something.” 

Darcy felt jealousy run through him at the thought of his cousin stealing Elizabeth out from under him. Not that she belonged to him, but he still felt possessive over her and his want was overpowering his reason. 

“You’re her boss now Richard, it wouldn’t be very prudent.” 

“I’m surprised at you Darcy, I’ve never seen you interested in a woman. I think it will be quite interesting to watch you take a romantic interest in someone.” 

“She will never be interested in me; I’ve already seen to that well enough.” 

“I don’t know the details of what you’ve done, but I bet you still have one more option.” 

“Oh? What would that be?” 

“Georgiana. When she comes back from her vacation in a week, I will introduce Elizabeth to her.” 

“She’ll connect the dots when she hears Georgie’s last name.”

“Have a little faith in your sister.” 

 

Georgiana Darcy was adopted. She had to be, Lizzie was sure. That, or Darcy was adopted. They couldn’t possibly be related by blood. Georgiana, or Gigi as she liked to be called, was tall, lithe but looked strong, blonde, and positively angelic. Her brother was different. Where Gigi exuded kindness and light, Darcy showed hardness and darkness. Lizzie couldn’t think about him without shivering and getting goose bumps all over. Thing was, now that she worked every day with his angel of a sister, she couldn’t help but think of him constantly. Not once had Darcy been mentioned. After some investigative googling, she had found out that Darcy and her new boss Richard were cousins. Then Gigi walks into the office on Lizzie’s second week at work and introduces herself as Georgiana, Richard’s cousin and partner in his firm. On her door was her full name, Georgiana Anne Darcy. When Lizzie had seen this her blood had gone ice cold. She was suddenly surrounded by his family, how had that even happened? 

Another couple of weeks went past. Nothing was out of the ordinary anywhere in her life. At work things were going just fine. Richard was a good boss, nice but a little flirty. Lizzie didn’t think much of it, it never came close to inappropriate. Lizzie hadn’t seen much of Gigi lately, and one week she wasn’t there at all. Gone home for a week, Richard had said. Lizzie couldn’t help but think that Gigi’s home might include Darcy. 

Monday morning the week after Gigi had taken a weeklong holiday, Lizzie came to the office to find a note on her desk. Gigi wanted to see her in her office. 

Lizzie walked over to the office door and carefully knocked. A ‘come in’ sounded from inside in Gigi’s angelic voice. 

“Ah Lizzie! Wonderful! I’m so sorry I went away last week without saying anything, but I had a bit of a family emergency.”

Lizzie wondered how much Gigi knew about her and Darcy, and not wanting to give anything away, she simply smiled and shrugged her shoulders. “It’s alright.”

“I…heard from my cousin that you already know my brother, though he never told me how. It was him I went to see.” 

“Oh. Well, yes…know is a strong word, I know of him, and I suppose he knows of me.” 

“Uh…right, that he does. He spent like an hour trying to pretend not to be interested when I told him of my new co-worker.”

“You talked about me for an hour? We hardly know each other.” Lizzie was a little shocked.

Gigi laughed a clear, bubbling laugh. “Yes, I noticed right away there was something when I mentioned your name. I had to dig further. Alas, he would give nothing away.” 

“There’s really nothing to give away. We’ve met a few times, that’s all.”

“I know you must know about what he does. I don’t approve but he is my brother so I don’t interfere.” 

“Right…” Lizzie didn’t know where this bizarre conversation was going, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to know. Everyone seemed to know about what Darcy does for a living, but not one of them has done anything about it. On second thought, neither had she. 

“Anyway, he’s such a monk. I just thought, I don’t know, maybe I could fix you two up some time? I could tell there was something when I talked about you. I’m pretty sure he likes you.”

“I’m sorry Gigi, I like you a lot, but Darcy…he gets on my last nerve. If I were to sit through a dinner with him, it wouldn’t end well. Also, I’m fairly certain he has no interest in seeing me again.” 

“Oh, that bad huh?”

“Yeah…I couldn’t even tell you, he’s your brother after all.”

“Has he done something to you? Is that how you know him? Through his job?” Gigi sounded like she hadn’t considered the possibility before. What had she thought, Lizzie wondered.

“Not to me no…” On the contrary really, he had been so angry when he thought she had gotten involved. “Maybe we could talk about this some other time? Outside of the office?”

“Of course, but you don’t have to. Only if you want to talk, I’m here.”

“Thank you, that means a lot.” 

 

 

It was ten in the evening when someone turned the lock in the door of Darcy’s townhouse. Seconds later Gigi stormed in and stopped in front of her brother, an accusatory look on her face. 

“Georgiana, what…?” Darcy was shocked at his sister’s behaviour. 

“Elizabeth Bennet is ‘what’.” Gigi retorted. 

“Ah…She’s told you huh?” He was a little surprised for it didn’t seem like her. 

“No, in fact, she has not told me. I could figure it out all on my own. And while I don’t know the exact details, I know enough! I can’t believe you!”

“I don’t know what you think you know, but let me assure you, I have never hurt her in any way.” 

“No, she said as much, although you must have done something, so spill it! Now!” 

“With all due respect sis, but it’s none of your business.” 

“It is when it concerns my friend.” 

“You didn’t even know her then!” 

“I didn’t have to. I have turned a blind eye to your extracurricular activities, but if it’s going to intrude on good, decent people’s lives, I have to put my foot down.” 

“I’m sorry I’ve upset you Gigi, but this is something you won’t understand. But it doesn’t matter anymore. Whatever could have been between someone like me and Elizabeth Bennet…is gone now.” 

“So you do like her!”

Darcy looked like he wasn’t following the conversation any more. 

“I…I don’t know what it is, I just know I won’t ever have her, so it doesn’t matter what I feel.” 

“What if you turned on some Darcy charm and tried?” 

“She’s immune, trust me.” 

“I can’t believe that. Your side business aside, you are the real deal big brother, and you deserve some happiness.”

“I don’t deserve her. I wish I did, I wish I could, but she would never have me. I could give her the world and she wouldn’t care. Bingley was right, I should listen to myself and let it go.”

“No one could be unmoved by that, if you only told her instead of me.”

“No…she is better off. But tell me something, is she all right? How does she seem?”

“Just fine, happy I’d say.” 

“Good, good.” 

“Whatever you did, it can’t be so bad that you are damned forever.” 

“It is, ask her and tell her I told you it was all right to tell you. I don’t think she will otherwise.”

“So your say so matters to her?”

“It matters to her integrity I think. She’s too good to talk about others, even if it’s true.” 

“I think you’ve put her on a pedestal she doesn’t deserve to be put on. It’s not a kindness to raise someone so high. You know what brother; I’ve been waiting for the day you’d tell me about a girl you like and this is what you bring me. You just always have to overdo it.”


	7. Tag, you're it.

“This is ridiculous Charles.” Darcy adjusted his vest. The room was dark with only the exit sign throwing a faint light out into the darkness. 

“You just haven’t experienced this before, it’s not ridiculous.” Charlie ran a hand through his hair, slicking it back. He was out of breath and ran on an adrenaline high. 

“I know when I’m in over my head.”

“What makes you think you’re in over your head?”

“All the indicators point to it.” 

“You’re not alone you know, I’m here for you, and so is Gigi.”

“There are five of them, the little monsters, we can’t possibly win. I’ve already been fragged like six times. Laser tag is not a grown-up game and you won’t convince me otherwise.”

“Man up brother, I got the twins, Charlie gets the redhead and the half blind mousey one and you get the big one with some kind of hyper drive.” Gigi’s vest had stopped blinking since the last time she had been hit and they had re-grouped to strategize. Unfortunately, the 7th graders they were facing were hard-core laser taggers. Darcy thought the game was unfair; the aim on his gun was way off. If he’d had something even slightly similar to a real rifle or just a handgun he’d have dominated. 

“I can’t believe we’re being humiliated by kids.”

“They aren’t kids, they’re demons.” Charles supplied helpfully. 

When the game was over they had been thoroughly defeated by the spawns of Satan. Darcy and Charles were covered in sweat and grime but decided to go back to Darcy’s house to shower, the men’s showers in the locker room were nasty. Gigi however came out of the women’s locker room looking clean and refreshed. “

Awesome shower in there,” she remarked when she took in their still dirty appearance. “Going for the construction worker-look are we?” she teased. 

“Going for not attracting tetanus.” Darcy said and shot a mildly disgusted look towards the door to their locker room. 

“Not attracting anything else either…” she muttered as they exited the building. 

Unbeknownst to Darcy, Gigi had been texting Lizzie during the day and had arranged for her new friend to come pick her up outside the arena instead of leaving with Darcy and Charlie. When they stepped out into the sunshine Lizzie was waiting there, leaning back on her new, but old, Ford F-150 and catching some of the rays shining down. 

Darcy saw her right away and stopped in his tracks. He didn’t know how to interact with her. Damn it. Charlie walked right in to his suddenly still frame. Gigi was in front of them and continued unfazed towards the other woman. They hugged when Gigi reached her and then Lizzie saw Darcy and Charles over Gigi’s shoulder. Darcy was wearing sunglasses so she couldn’t read his expression but his mouth was set in the same severe way it always was. Not that she was looking at his mouth. He’d started moving again and he and Charlie had now caught up with Gigi. 

“Charlie!” she greeted, “what’s up?” 

“Hey Lizzie! Oh, you know, same old same old.” He looked slightly confused, like he’d missed something. “How do you know Gigi?” he asked. 

“We work together, I’d have thought you’d know that.” She didn’t mention why she’d thought that, they all knew why. 

“No, sometimes these two conveniently forget to tell me things.” He tried to glare at Darcy, but failed miserably. 

“You’re not the only one Charles,” Darcy muttered. 

“What, don’t tell me you didn’t know they work together, you know everything about Gigi.” 

“I did know that, what I didn’t know is that she’d be here, or that they hang out outside of work.”

“Hey, “she” is right here, thank you.” Lizzie didn’t like being talked about when she was there to hear it. 

“I am only too painfully aware.” She had to know what it did to him to see her. Was she doing this to him on purpose?

“What is that supposed to mean?” Did he always have to question everything? Just go with it for once in your life!

“Nothing. When did you get a truck? I thought you were just so happy taking the bus everywhere.” Rusty death trap it is too. She really should get something newer, safer. 

“Yeah well, I’ve upgraded since I got a job, but not everyone can snap their fingers and own a Jag you know.” Not that it is any of his business what she does with her money. 

Darcy turned to his sister who was watching the back and forth bemused, “I assume you’ll be going with her?” He asked.

“Yeah, I’ll see you guys later.” Darcy and Charles started walking towards Darcy’s Jaguar. 

“Hey, Charlie!” Lizzie called after them, “you ever talk to John nowadays?” 

Charlie threw a quick glance at Darcy and turned back. “Not a whole lot, I think he might be shutting me out. Again. If you see him, tell him…tell him I miss him, alright?” 

“Yeah, sure.” She was sick and tired of seeing John getting more depressed and isolated. There’s nothing wrong with keeping to yourself if you’re fine, but John wasn’t fine.

 

“Soo…I have a confession to make.” Gigi said carefully. 

Lizzie and Gigi had been out to lunch and they were currently in line at the very coffee stand where Lizzie had spilt Darcy’s coffee a couple of months earlier. 

“Really, what kind of confession?” What could Gigi possibly have to confess to her?

“It’s about a person we have in common.”

“Richard?” A vain hope, but still. 

“Ah, no, the other one. My dear brother.”

Lizzie sighed and rolled her eyes. “What about Darcy?” Gigi had every few days tried to sneak in something positive about her brother when Lizzie was within earshot. Lizzie couldn’t be sure, but she felt the faint scent of matchmaking in the air. 

“I don’t really care why the two of you are on the outs, truly. I just think you could be so great together. Like, great great. Downright serious relationship material.” 

“Never going to happen Gigi. He’s attractive and all I suppose, but I can’t see past everything else. He’s so arrogant, conceited, selfish…”

“You seem awfully busy thinking of ways you don’t like him. All I’m saying is it would be nice. Even if it’s just so you could attend the same events without any animosity. There’s the charity-gala a couple of weeks from now you know. He’ll be at our table, just FYI.” It bothered Gigi that someone thought such bad things about her brother. It bothered her even more that that person is someone she calls friend. 

“Why do you even care? Do you try to hook your brother up with everyone you meet or something?” Lizzie wished Gigi would give up this plan she’s hatched. Even if Lizzie liked him, he did not like her. He obviously thought she was incapable of doing basically anything right. He could find flaws in just about anything she does. Don’t think she hadn’t noticed the sneer he gave her truck. 

“No, god. He likes you. Otherwise I wouldn’t bother.”

“Did he say that to you?” 

“Well, no, not those exact words, but it boils down to the same thing. Though he has basically given up. I don’t like it when his heart is broken, and normally I’d want to strangle you for being the cause, but I get that it’s his fault, so.” 

“I never asked for his attention. And even if he liked me once, it was a while ago now.” 

“I’m not saying you have, but I love him, and I like you. So, you know, think about maybe at least being friendly? For me?”

“No promises Gigi. I meant it when I said he gets on my nerves.” 

“Yeah okay. I guess I just have this rose-tinted view, I can’t see how he could do something so wrong you’d be turned against him for good.” Gigi paused for a moment as she received her coffee from the vendor. “He told me to tell you that you could tell me, if you wanted to.” 

“What is this, middle school? If he wants to tell me something, he has my goddamn number.” Thinking about him, talking about him, it drove Lizzie pretty damn mad. She could see that Gigi was a little shocked at her outburst, and calmed down a little. “It’s not just about me, the whole story, it’s why I haven’t thought it my story to tell. And I don’t know if I want to crush that rose-tinted glass you look at him through. Even though he deserves it, you don’t.” Lizzie both wanted and didn’t want to tell Gigi. It would certainly get her off of Lizzie’s back about getting down and dirty with Darcy though. 

“But he’s consented to you telling it, if you wanted to. Is there someone else involved as well?”

“Yes, though I don’t think he’d really mind if I told you, I know it won’t go any further.”

And so, Lizzie and Gigi moved to a secluded part of the nearby park, found a bench to sit on, and Lizzie recited events up until the time when the whole business with John had finished. She didn’t want to tell Gigi she knew about Gigi’s ex, just in case it was still a sore subject and thus, she didn’t tell her how Darcy had found her and Charlotte outside the Lodge. That meant she didn’t tell Gigi how Darcy had practically told her he had feelings for her, and how her own heart had jumped, just a little, when she’d touched his chest and felt his heart racing underneath. But the way he had acted the next few times they had met, it seemed clear to her that it had been her imagination playing tricks on her. 

When she had finished the story, Gigi sat silent for a while. Lizzie didn’t know just how much Gigi knew about the darker side of Darcy’s business ventures and she could imagine it was a shock to hear how he could negatively impact people’s lives. 

“Georgiana? Are you alright?” Gigi looked up at her with glossy eyes.

“I’m so sorry,” she said “I had no idea.” She thought that maybe William bent the rules a little sometimes. That he did certain things out of sight of the authorities. But being a loan-shark? Battery? It was too far. 

“About what he does?”

“No, no I knew about that,” Lie. “I just that I hadn’t imagined he could have done something like that to YOU. The way he feels, or at least felt, about you…it just doesn’t make sense.” She looked very puzzled. 

“I don’t know, maybe he just feels guilty, we haven’t really talked since…” she almost said too much, but reeled it in.

“Since you left his office that day?” 

“Yeah, right. Also, he didn’t know me before it happened so he could hardly foresee any kind of feelings he might develop later.” She didn’t want to play into Gigi’s idea of them, but she had believed he had some kind of romantic feelings towards her once. Maybe she was wrong. 

“Now that I know, I’ll totally back off. I couldn’t believe it was so complicated between the two of you. I’m sorry he did what he did Lizzie, and I’m sorry I knew and said nothing.” Gigi reached out and gave Lizzie’s hand a pat, then got up and left. Lizzie couldn’t help but feel guilty. She’d only told the truth, but it might have ruined Gigi’s relationship with her only brother. Lizzie knew what it could be like to feel disconnected from your sibling.


	8. Family matters

The days kept coming and going, but Gigi was much more distant than before. She had excuses for not hanging out outside of work, and at work she kept it professional. Lizzie had tried asking her what was wrong, but had only gotten a vague response. She wanted to be there to support her friend if she was having a hard time, probably dealing with what she’d learned about her brother. 

When another week had passed of the same, Lizzie decided to do something. It was time to put her resentment aside and help her friend. She began by talking to Richard, who dug out his phone and scratched a few digits down on a piece of paper. Later that night, after thinking about it some more, deciding back and forth what she should do, she finally picked up her phone and punched in the numbers. 

“Hello…?” His voice was unsure. She didn’t know if he had her number programmed so he knew it was her calling or if he just answered unknown numbers like that. 

“Hi…It’s Lizzie.” What was she even doing?

“Yes, I know, hi.” 

“I need to talk to you about Gigi. I told her about, you know, things.” 

“Yes, I found out as much. We had a bit of a row that night...” he faded out of the sentence, like he couldn’t quite believe it had happened. 

“She’s acting strange, quiet, making up excuses for not spending time together. Is she like that with you as well?” Maybe she had decided to side with her brother against Lizzie, which Lizzie could sort of understand. Sort of. 

“Oh, she’s not speaking to me at all, I haven’t seen or heard from her since that night. I only know she’s alive because Richard tells me.” He sounded sad, but she couldn’t be sure, she had never heard him sad before. 

“Don’t the two of you live together?” Lizzie had always thought so, though neither of them had ever said so, come to think of it. 

He gave sort of a sad chuckle. “No, she has her own place, but we do spend a lot of time together, or we used to.” 

“I’m sorry.” The words were out before she could think better of it. “I’ve completely ruined her relationship with you, and for such selfish reasons.”

“No. Nothing you ever do is selfish.” He hadn’t been able to stop himself, but he couldn’t let her blame herself. “I am the only one to blame, I wish I could go back in time and re-do things. I really do.” Only he would never have met Lizzie Bennet if he did that, but to make her happy, and make Gigi happy, it was a sacrifice he would have made. He clutched his phone tightly, like the tighter he held it, the closer she was. 

“No matter whose fault it is… my friend, your sister, is upset and we need to fix it.” She hadn’t known Gigi for very long, but already the other woman was very important to her. 

“What do you suggest?” 

 

Two days later, anyone passing by Darcy House in London would be passing only a few metres from William Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet, sitting on opposite sides of Darcy’s kitchen table, staring at each other. 

“We need to convince her that we’ve made up. She has to think that things are fine. If she thinks no damage is done, she can forgive you, and she can stop walking on eggshells around me.” Lizzie thought it was a decent strategy. She figured could act pretty well now if she had to, and she had to. If Gigi was feeling guilty by association, Lizzie would put a stop to the reason of the guilt. 

“Since you won’t actually consider forgiving me, I suppose I’ll take pretending.” He didn’t actually sound or look mad, but the sentence felt like it should sound mad. He was, however, only stating the fact. 

“Forgiving you would mean siding with you against John, and that won’t happen.” He actually seemed human now, but she would not be tricked into a false sense of security around him. 

“Have you asked John about that? Maybe you’re more upset than he is.” 

“So what if I am? Just because you somehow suddenly grew a conscience and waved away 10 grand it doesn’t just absolve you of everything.” He made it sound like the issue had been something tiny, a casual disagreement, not threats and physical abuse. 

“I didn’t suddenly grow a conscience. I didn’t want you in debt for however many years. I would have taken the money off of John without a second thought. Your brother took a stupid risk that he couldn’t handle and deserved what he got.” He started to sound angry, but only a little, the mask hadn’t slipped just yet. 

“Why not? What did it matter to you? Me or John, who really cares?” 

“I do, for entirely selfish reasons.” Here we go. 

“Like?”

“Like the fact that I was in love with you, but you knew that already, so I don’t see the point of these questions.” Lizzie had the wind knocked out of her but recovered quickly. The mask had slipped. 

“You’ve never said it before. You’ve just been all rakish. Gigi practically said it, but I figured she was exaggerating because she wanted to set us up.” Was in love, so no longer. 

He looked like a kicked puppy. “She wasn’t wrong. But I have accepted that I can’t win this fight. So, considering I have already lost, I can make whatever concession you wish of me.” I’m done, he thought. He could give her whatever she deigned ask, and he would. 

“Isn’t that just like a tragic hero.” She put on a sarcastic façade. Lizzie didn’t want to feel sorry for Darcy. It was weird. 

“Just because I’ve given up it doesn’t mean that the things you say to me won’t hurt me. It isn’t like you to intentionally wound like that.” He could see that she felt insecure in this tentative truce of theirs, but he didn’t like how it made her lash out. 

“You don’t know me Darcy, you were in love with a fantasy, not the real me.” How much of the real him did she know? Maybe this was what he was, or maybe there was more to find under the surface. She had to get him to realize he was making her out to be something she’s not. 

“I know what I feel.” He was nothing if not constant in his affections for her. 

“This isn’t getting us anywhere.” Lizzie got up and rounded the table to exit the kitchen. She was uncomfortable with Darcy laying his cards on the table. She could handle his brooding and his existence in the periphery but not his blunt honesty right in her face. 

“No it isn’t. We’ll just have to give Gigi as much time as she needs without interference.” 

“You do that, I’m going to talk to her and set some things straight once and for all.” She was done with this Darcy circus, and she would set things right. 

She started to reach for her jacket, but he was quicker and held it out for her to slide her arms into. Once it was securely on her shoulders he let his hands rest there, tracing small circles with his thumbs. She tried to move but her feet wouldn’t comply, the heat of him at her back felt incredible. She’d have thought it would be fear she felt having him so close, but it wasn’t. If anything, it made her feel safe. 

His rational side told him to stop, to step back, but his irrational side whacked its opponent over the head and leaned down to kiss her neck. When she didn’t move, he turned her around to face him and let his right hand move to rest at the nape of her neck, then leaned down to kiss her on the lips. He began carefully but soon deepened the kiss and pulled her closer with his other arm tightening around her back. By this point she had grabbed hold of his shoulders and returned the kiss with equal fervour. She fit so perfectly in his arms, and he knew it would be a short-lived happiness followed by long, drawn out torture. 

A moment later Darcy let her go and stepped back. He caressed her cheek lightly and smiled at her. “Good-bye Elizabeth.” 

She wasn’t sure how to respond. She’d loved every second of it, but at the same time she felt so conflicted. How could he affect her so? It wasn’t right. “What was that?” And why had he stopped? And why did his good-bye sound so final?

“I’m sorry.” Not really though, or he wouldn’t have done it. “It was my bad impulse control. I just had to kiss you, just once.” One last attempt, he thought. 

Lizzie didn’t know what to say or do. She was so set on hating him, but despite that, he was slowly breaking down the wall she’d built up. She realised that she’d probably been standing there just quietly looking at him for a while when he shifted his weight and the movement snapped her out of her reverie. 

“I…I don’t know what to say or do now.” She finally admitted. She didn’t know, it was all so damn confusing and he wasn’t helping the situation at all. He could kiss her again, he could walk away, but he was simply there, now leaning in the door opening to the kitchen and looking at her. She could do something, but she figured if she kissed him again, he’d take that as more than it was, and if she left, he’d give up completely. For some strange reason, she did not want him to give up. Not anymore. She realized that somewhere along the road she had started to enjoy the idea of him thinking about her and wanting her. She did not know when it had happened. 

“You were leaving, if I remember correctly.” He muttered. 

“Yeah well you put a stop to that, didn’t you?” She closed her jacket to make a little move towards leaving, without actually leaving. 

“You are welcome to stay.” He straightened up and closed in on her again. He took hold of the belt that decorated her jacket around her waist. “I would be very happy if you would stay.” 

“I can’t, it’s all too much. God! Why couldn’t you be a normal human being? Why do you have to be, whatever it is you are?” How could he stand there and seem so normal, when she knows damn well that he is far from it. 

“Which part about me is it you don’t want to exist exactly?”

“You know very well which part. The super-villain-evil-genius-gangster-extraordinaire-part. The rest of you I think I can deal with.” 

“I’m not a super-villain or an evil genius, and not very extraordinary. I get that you have this picture of me because of how we met, but it isn’t like that most of the time. I don’t run some kind of racketeering business and I don’t usually take on the business of people who can’t handle it. I only took on John because Charlie asked me to. I shouldn’t have, but I couldn’t let John spread around that I let behaviour like his just go. It wouldn’t be very good for business.” 

“It isn’t legal to beat people up. And I notice you aren’t denying the gangster part, be it an ordinary one.” 

“Like I said, it isn’t an everyday occurrence. I’m not Al Capone.” 

“How much of your wealth comes from the actual business you are known for and how much is from your little side action? How much of your time does it take up? The truth, please.” She didn’t know why she asked, why it mattered. She just wanted to know how big a part of him she detested and she didn’t know how else to ask. 

“I couldn’t give you a number. It isn’t what I set out to do, but it has worked out well enough.” His transactions off the books overturned enough for him to live a very comfortable life on. It was the legal money however that kept the gold crust on his life. He figured that she couldn’t find out the truth on her own, so the lie wouldn’t hurt them. “The thing with John, it got out of hand and I was wrong to handle it like I did.” He pulled her close and she let him, he leaned down so his mouth was brushing against her ear and whispered, “Forgive me, please. Elizabeth…” He was interrupted when the door was swung open and Gigi entered the hallway.


	9. Boys with blue eyes

Gigi had decided to have it out once and for all with her brother about his business. She was determined to make him stop and determined to help him. He had done so much for her during her life that she didn’t feel she was being fair shutting him out of her life like she had lately. She used her key to open the door to his house, and found him standing in the hallway, his arms around Lizzie, his mouth at her cheek and her hands splayed over his chest. 

The sight was a little shocking. It was the last thing she had expected to find in his house. But it was a good thing to find. Lizzie quickly moved back from Darcy, but he wasn’t as quick to let her go. His hands fell to his sides as she stepped out of his grasp and they both stared at Gigi, not sure what to do now. 

“I see you two are speaking again.” Gigi began. 

Lizzie took Gigi’s appearance as a sign to get out of this confusing situation. “I have to go,” she said. “It’s really nice to see you here Gigi, maybe you can call me later?” 

“Uh, yeah, I could come over after I’m done here?”

This made Lizzie very happy to hear, maybe Gigi was back to normal. “Yeah, do. Bye.” Lizzie shot a glance towards Darcy who looked disappointed, then exited the door. 

“Oh brother, what have you managed to do now?” 

“Not that I am not very happy to see you Gigi, but your timing could be better.”

“Yes, sorry about that. I seem to have interrupted something very cosy.” 

“Yes. She…god she’s… all I have never known I wanted.” But he had a feeling that she was out of his reach yet again.

“Well then I’m happy for you, don’t mess up again though. It’s easier if I can hang out with you both.”

“She hasn’t forgiven me. You saw how quickly she left.” If he’d just had a few moments more with her, it had felt so right…

“The course of true love and all that brother.” 

“I’m not so patient.”

“Oh, you’ll learn.”

 

John had been unusually absent from Lizzie’s everyday life lately, so she was a little surprised to find him sitting in the sunshine on her doorstep waiting for her. He actually looked like himself again. Golden curls shining and skin sun kissed. He must have been hitting the gym pretty frequently as well, putting on a little bit more muscle. All in all, her brother finally looked back in good health. He was smiling at her when she stopped in front of him. 

“Hi sis.” He sounded a little unsure, but still optimistic. 

“Hey big bro.” 

“Sorry I haven’t been around lately. I’ve been trying to shape up a bit more, get things in order again.” He looked guilty. He would never be able to forgive himself for disappointing his sister and dragging her down with him. 

“Are things in order?”

“Yeah, they actually are. And it is all thanks to you really, getting me out of that mess I got myself in. Thank you, Lizzie. I feel like I can’t say that enough.” 

“I’m just glad you are back to yourself.” Lizzie felt like a stone lifted from her shoulders when hearing this and seeing John genuinely smile again. 

“I am. I really am.”

“Well, are you just going to sit there, or do I get a hug?”

John got up and engulfed Lizzie in his embrace. “How about grabbing a bite to eat?” 

John and Lizzie spent the rest of the afternoon and evening together. They talked, ate, laughed and took a walk as the sun started to set. Lizzie felt as if there was something else John wanted to tell her, but she couldn’t get a read on what it could be. She figured he’d get around to it in his own time. She had relayed the message from Charlie, and John had looked pained for a moment. She didn’t know exactly what her brother felt for Charlie, but she knew there still was something there, some unresolved feelings. She felt like she could relate a little. Not that her own confused feelings about Darcy were comparable to the relationship that had existed between John and Charlie, but there seemed to be a lot of misunderstanding and confusion in both situations. 

She thought about telling John about how Darcy had kissed her, and more importantly, how her own body had overridden her mind and betrayed her like that. But, how could she? John was on track again, he was happy. She had done more than she should have by mentioning Charlie’s message. If she brought up Darcy, not to mention kissing Darcy, he might feel like she wasn’t on his side anymore. She finally came to the logical conclusion that things would never go further with Darcy anyway. He might be attracted to her (and she to him), but he’d get over it. She just had to stay well away from him for a while. 

 

Days passed quickly and it was now one week until the gala that Gigi had mentioned and Lizzie had to find something, anything, decent to wear. Shopping could be fun if you found what you were looking for in the first few shops, but Lizzie was having no such luck. When the day was nearing its end and only 30 minutes remained of the opening hours in the mall, Lizzie made her way to the last shop, with decent clothes mind you, remaining. Her mother would skin her alive if she went to a gala looking anything but pristine. 

She perused the racks for a minute or two before a pretty nice looking blonde guy joined her. He looked about her age, perhaps a few years older, and had striking blue eyes. They reminded her of Darcy. When had things started to remind her of that man? How was it that her general survival instinct hadn’t kicked in when it came to him?

They talked as he helped her pick out clothes and somehow clicked instantly. He was fun, nice and easy-going. When they were finished about an hour later and all stores had already closed, they exchanged phone numbers. She had never done something like that before, but it seemed that lately things weren’t happening the way they did before. Before him. 

During the week that followed Lizzie and George saw each other almost every day. It was now Friday and the day was coming to a close. Lizzie’s phone rang just as she was leaving work. The screen flashed with George’s name on it, and Lizzie smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a strange place to end, but otherwise the next chapter would be weirdly long.


	10. A tale of two hearts

“Hello George.”

“Hi Lizzie, how are you this fine day?”

“I’m good, you?”

“I’m good too, though I would be even better if you were to grace me with your presence this evening.”

“Oh? What did you have in mind?”

“A bar, well a club really, sort of. A night out.” He sounded very excited at the prospect. 

Lizzie hadn’t been out in a long time and she felt George’s excitement rub off on her. The gala was the next night, but she felt like going somewhere where she wouldn’t be on display. 

“Alright, sounds fun. Meet at my place and take a cab there?” George readily agreed and they made plans to meet up at ten thirty. 

 

The club wasn’t like anything Lizzie had been to before. It was like a piece of history had stayed put in this one place. There was champagne served in coupes, card tables and people wearing suits and dresses and a live band playing swing, jazz and bluegrass. 

Lizzie was wearing tight black jeans with a long navy blue blouse and a long thin silver necklace plunging down its front. It made her look very modern compared to the twenties dresses worn by most of the other women. She only now noticed that George actually worn clothes that fit in very well with the atmosphere. 

“Care to dance?” He asked her and motioned his hands towards the dance floor in front of the band. She took his hand and let him lead her to join several other couples dancing. George smiled at her, but for some reason it didn’t make her feel anything. His smile seemed like a façade. She had hoped that when George had come along that he would be the one to distract her thoughts from William Darcy, but she had no such luck. Lizzie decided to enjoy the fun and light-heartedness that George provided, and not expect anything deeper from him. The band began playing a slower song, and to Lizzie’s surprise George pulled her closer. It didn’t seem like something he would do, that they would do, but she went along with it. 

 

Darcy and Richard were at the club playing cards, and quite enjoying themselves, when Richard suddenly stiffened and tried to act like it was nothing. Darcy was not so easily fooled however and turned to follow Richards gaze. First he registered Wickham’s fake smile directed at a woman in his arms. They were dancing slowly around the dance floor, staying very close together. Poor girl, Darcy thought, she has no idea with whom she is dealing. As the couple turned so Wickham had his back to them, Darcy realized that Richard’s reaction had not only been because of Wickham, but because the girl was Elizabeth Bennet. 

Darcy’s gut instinct was to get up, go over there, and drag Elizabeth away from him. Richard could probably tell that was what he was thinking and put a hand on his arm while shaking his head. “Don’t overreact,” he said, “it might be exactly what he wants.”

“What is she doing with him? Can’t she tell…?” he trailed off. He knew very well how pleasant and charming Wickham could be. It was not her fault. “I have to get her away from him. I can’t let her be taken in.” 

“She’s a grown woman, she can handle herself. But if you must do something, they are leaving the floor. Let’s go over and say hello. Do not overreact. Keep your cool.”

“God damn it, he just has to sink his poisonous teeth into every woman who means anything to me. Fucking bastard.”

“I said cool, not boiling.” Richard was a little worried. If Darcy couldn’t keep a lid on it, things would escalate in a very bad way. 

“He has no right to be in my club, I should have him thrown out.” How George knew about his connection with Lizzie was puzzling, but he was sure to find out soon enough. 

“And embarrass Lizzie?”

“She could stay with me; she doesn’t have to go with him.” 

“In that situation, with probably no context, do you find that likely to happen?”

“If I tell her what a snake he is. She already knows about Georgie, she just doesn’t know who he was. If I tell her, she won’t go with him.” 

Richard could see the chaos that would unfold before his very eyes if Darcy stormed over there and tried to convince Lizzie that Wickham is a snake in the grass. As he looked over to his cousin, he could tell that Darcy was reaching the same conclusion. 

“Stay here, I will go over and say hello.” Darcy got up but didn’t move to continue right away. “I won’t overreact. I will not let him get to me anymore. Trust me.” 

Richard just nodded and took a sip of champagne. He knew Darcy to be tough and fearless, but somehow Elizabeth Bennet had instilled a vulnerability in him that made him unpredictable. Before Lizzie had come in to the picture, everything Darcy had done had been calculated and precise. Now though, Richard had little idea of what to expect. 

Darcy walked towards the couple as they were waiting for drinks at the bar. He was coming up from behind Wickham and caught Lizzie’s attention as soon as he stepped down from the plateau that held the gambling tables. She looked quizzical, like she couldn’t quite compute this place with his presence. 

George was droning on about something or other and didn’t notice that his partner’s attention strayed from him. Lizzie’s gaze had been drawn to Darcy the moment he stepped out of the shadows that enveloped a plateau along one side of the club. How long had he been there? Had he seen her dance with George? Why did she even care if he had seen them? 

While her thoughts were otherwise engaged, George had stopped talking and turned to see where her attention had been diverted. It was almost too good to be true. Could it be? Could he, George Wickham, have managed to get at another woman with a connection to Darcy? He had only wanted to rub just how easy he could get a beautiful woman in Darcy’s face. 

Darcy didn’t spare a glance for Wickham. “Elizabeth, lovely to see you as always.” He greeted her, taking her hand and kissing it. 

She didn’t know how to handle a conversation with Darcy in front of George. Darcy was hard enough to deal with on his own, but now George was staring at her as well. Darcy’s gaze was intense and impassive. Georges seemed more annoyed but also a little mischievous. 

“Darcy old chap, how are you?” George put on a fake smile and turned to Darcy. 

Darcy glared at him, looked quickly to Elizabeth and then responded. “You have been banned from this club Wickham. Are you going to leave on your own or am I going to have to make you?”

“Banned?” Lizzie asked George, but didn’t wait for a response from him. Instead she turned to Darcy “How could you make him? You don’t own the place.” 

“Come on Darcy, it’s been ages, I’m sure we’re past all that now.”

Darcy didn’t even look at George again, he only responded to Elizabeth. “I do own it, and he is not welcome.”

Of course he did, how could she have thought otherwise? “Why?” 

“Because he’s a stick in the mud, that’s why! If you know him, you have to know that.” George answered instead of Darcy. Lizzie didn’t think he was being very funny. 

“I suppose I do know him.” Darcy looked at her with a quirk of his eyebrow. 

“There you have it then! Come on Lizzie, let’s have another turn about the room.” George tried to grab Lizzie’s hand but he was blocked by Darcy’s arm. 

“You will be leaving now.” Darcy motioned to two men who had approached them since Darcy had joined them. “These gentlemen will escort you outside.” Darcy took a light hold of Wickham’s tie and made it seem like he was smoothing it down. Wickham had frozen in place, surprised by the action. “Do not come back.” There was no room for interpretation in his words. 

Lizzie watched them, puzzled by what just happened. How did Darcy and George even know each other? Darcy didn’t watch as the men escorted George outside. He had turned back to Lizzie and was watching her with an enigmatic look on his face. 

“What the hell was that?” She asked. 

“Do you remember anything I told you on the night of your graduation?”

The night of her graduation was a particularly hazy night memory wise. But she did remember most of the intense things Darcy had said. “You said a lot of things, I’m pretty sure I remember most of them. I wasn’t that drunk.”

“You were that drunk. I’m specifically speaking about Georgie and her ex.” He paused. 

“Yes, I remember, her ex attacked her on the night of her graduation.” She had never asked Gigi about it. There wasn’t any point in asking, she probably wouldn’t know who he was anyway. 

“George Wickham cheated on my sister multiple times. When she found out and kicked him to the curb, he turned mean. That night she hadn’t heard from him for a month and finally felt like she was free of him. When she was waiting for me to pick her up, he was waiting for her. He threatened her, hit her and left her alone in an alley not much different from the one I found you in that night.”

Lizzie was speechless. George had been so amiable, fun and light hearted. He had been easy to be around, unlike Darcy. She could hardly believe it. But why would Darcy lie about something like this? They had obviously known each other and George had known he was barred from the club. She felt bad about Gigi, being so hurt by someone she had loved. It was different for Lizzie. George hadn’t had a chance to hurt her, and Darcy had hurt her well before she felt anything for him, and the pain he caused her was secondary. 

A woman laughing loudly close to them brought Lizzie back to where they were. She looked around and saw the roaring twenties everywhere. Darcy was still standing in front of her. 

“Is there somewhere else we can have this conversation?” She asked.

“My office I suppose. This way.” He placed his hand lightly on the small of her back and steered her over to a door marked “staff only”. On the second floor were a couple of offices, storage rooms and changing rooms for the performers. His office had a small sign that said W.D. 

The room was darkly furnished with heavy wooden furniture clad in burgundy fabric. There were mahogany bookcases and she could smell the mustiness of the books in them. He gestured to the sofa and she sat down. He sat in an armchair on the other side of the coffee table. 

“These things about George, it is hard to believe them when all I know is that he’s a nice guy who’s fun to be around.” Something different from the confusion Darcy had injected into her life. 

“Ask Georgie if you don’t believe me.” He looked a little hurt at the implication that he might be lying.

“I’m not going to bring something like that up to her.” She was a little offended that he thought she would. 

“Do you believe me?” 

She was silent only for a moment. “Yes. I suppose I do.”

“Yes? That’s it? No other reaction?”

“I don’t know how to react yet. A few minutes ago, I was having a good time with a friend, and now he’s thrown out and I get to learn the disturbing reason why.”

“He would have turned on you eventually, it’s what he does.” 

“Maybe.” She still wasn’t a 100 percent convinced. 

“Do you need a ride home? Or would you like to stay a little longer?”

“Best not. I have to live through tomorrow night as well.”

“Yes, right. Can I offer you a ride?”

“What, do you own a car service as well?” She tried to joke, but she knew he was offering to drive her himself. It was just that having him alone within such a confined space, she couldn’t trust herself. 

“No. I will take you whenever you are ready.” His voice was steady and neutral. 

“I can’t ask you to do that, I took a cab here and I can take one home. Or I can take in the evening with a nice long walk.” If she started taking things from him, even a little help, he would get further into her life. He got further in when you welcomed his kiss, a voice in her head supplied helpfully. 

“I realise that you have an aversion to accepting my help, but this time I have to insist. I am not letting you wander out into the night on your own. It’s just basic safety.” He was getting a little annoyed at her reluctance to let him help, but didn’t let it show. 

“I don’t have an aversion, it’s just that I can take care of myself! And about you not letting me go outside on my own, that is some macho bullshit. It’s just like that time you wanted to know where I got the money, trying to intimidate me into getting what you want.”

“I did not try to intimidate you, and I am not trying to now. Where you got the money from was critical knowledge to pay whoever it might have been back. I couldn’t let you walk around with that kind of debt to just any old shark. And insisting on walking the streets of London alone after midnight is just stubborn.”

“Are you calling me stubborn?” He’d never said anything remotely negative about her before. It was refreshing. If he was beginning to see some flaws in her, maybe whatever pedestal he had put her on before was crumbling. 

“Yes.” Short and to the point. 

“Well, so are you. And arrogant.”

“If you don’t want me driving you, I will have one of my doormen drive you. Walking is still out of the question.” He held her gaze, daring her to argue. 

“I’m quite fond of walking I will have you know.”

“Yes, yes I know.” He’d learned that any time Lizzie had turned up at the townhouse to go out with Georgiana. She had always walked there. Her hair had been wild and her eyes bright. 

“Well then, I will have that walk now. If you want to join, I am not going to stop you. Otherwise, this is good night.” 

What had he even thought, that she would just accept his demands? When had that ever happened before?

“All right. Let’s go then.”

Most of the walk was conducted in silence. Lizzie didn’t know what to say when they weren’t arguing. Darcy knew a lot of things he wanted to say, but deemed none of them likely to be well received. 

After a while, Darcy stopped. It took Lizzie a few steps to realise he had stopped. “Something wrong?” she asked. 

“No. I was just thinking about something Richard told me earlier this evening.” Darcy had been pondering it ever since Richard had brought it up, and he was surprised at himself that he managed not to mention it in his and Lizzie’s earlier squabble. 

“Oh?”

“He said that you had expressed an interest in moving away from London.” If it was true, she would leave. It might be a good thing. Out of sight, out of mind, right?

“Ah. Yes, maybe. My family is originally from outside of London, in Hertfordshire. I have always had a wish to move back, and an opportunity for a job might be coming up there soon.”

“In Hertfordshire?” 

“Yes, Meryton. It means I could find somewhere nice to live in the countryside and be close to family. My aunt and uncle live there as well, they have a small farm.”

“I must have misunderstood Richard, he said it was your uncle who was trying to get you the job.”

“Yes, I have the Gardiners, who owns the farm, but also an uncle who is a lawyer. Mr Philips is his name; he’s married to my aunt on my mother’s side. Mr Gardiner is my mother’s brother.”

“Ah, makes sense. Still, aren’t you happy with working for Richard?” 

“Of course I am, Richard is great and so is Gigi and everyone else. It’s just that the business partner of my uncle Philips has taken ill, and he will need to bring more people on to handle the workload when his partner cannot work anymore.”

“And you feel the need to help.”

“Yes, I do. It’s a good position. Even if I love it here, I was always going to leave at some point after school.”

“But you haven’t even been here that long.” Not nearly long enough. If she left, he might never see her again. 

“I have though. We met like seven months ago, so maybe it doesn’t seem like it to you. But I moved here over six years ago to study. I’m practically a native.”

Darcy only nodded and continued walking. It seemed so strange to him that she had been so close for such a long time and he had never known. After a little while he spoke again. “When would you move?”

“I don’t know, probably late fall. My uncle said his partner was staying until end of the year, but they need to train someone new before then.”

“But surely there will be others who want the job, do you have to take it? Wouldn’t it be better to stay and get more experience here before moving on?” He was grasping at straws, screw getting her out of his mind. She sounded determined to leave and maybe it was because of him. He’d made her life here a lot more difficult than it had to be. If she was leaving because of him…he had to know. “Are you leaving because of me?” he asked, taking the bull by the horns. 

The question took her by surprise. It had never occurred to her to leave because of him and especially not now. “What? Why would you think that?” 

“You have to know why I’d think that. I haven’t exactly made things easier for you here. Last time we saw each other you couldn’t get out of there fast enough.” 

“I wasn’t expecting something like that to happen. It took me by surprise. Maybe I shouldn’t have left like that, but I didn’t exactly know what to do.”

“How long have you known George?” He asked. His abrupt change in topic was strange. She would have thought he wanted to talk about what had happened. She wanted to talk about it. Maybe he regretted it. If he was beginning to see her flaws, then maybe he wasn’t so taken with her any more. Maybe that was a good thing. 

“A week.” 

“A week!? A bit fast, isn’t it?” He wasn’t just jealous, he was incredulous. How could such a snake like Wickham charm Lizzie in just a week?

“Excuse me? What is that supposed to mean?” He might have been a lot of things to her, but he had never been cruel before. 

“Are you two sleeping together?” He had no right to ask, but he wanted to know. 

Offended at the question, Lizzie let her hand fly and hit its mark, right across Darcy’s face. “Don’t you dare judge anything I do. You have NO right! And what are you even talking about? George and I are, or were, friends! That’s it! Not that it is ANY of your business!” 

After a short moment of staring at each other in silence, she continued. “You better make up your mind Darcy, I am not dealing with your petty jealousy. I could have handled things better that day and after, but so could you. I don’t know where you’re at 99 percent of the time and I don’t know what to make of you. Don’t use George as a reason to pick a fight. I get that you’ve changed your mind about how you feel, but there is no need to be cruel.” She was almost out of breath after her rant. At least now she’d given him the out he needed. The fact that her own feelings had changed towards him was unimportant when he obviously did not care anything for her any more. He must think she’s damaged goods after a connection with George. She felt sick and she felt like crying. How did she end up here?

“I shouldn’t have asked. I’m sorry. He just makes my blood boil and I know I shouldn’t let it happen, but he still does. It was wrong to turn it on you.” He looked properly ashamed, but Lizzie didn’t have it in her heart to forgive right now. 

“My flat is just over there,” she pointed to a yellow brick building with blue balconies a block away. “I think we probably shouldn’t see each other for a while. It seems we can’t handle it properly.”

“The gala is tomorrow.” He pointed out. 

“I’m not really in the mood for a gala anymore.” With that she turned on her heel and stalked off.


	11. Alternative facts

Lizzie’s phone buzzed again. Gigi had been trying to get a hold of her since early this morning. She figured that Darcy had told his sister about how Lizzie had been out and about with Gigi’s abusive ex. How she was going to retain Gigi’s friendship after this, she did not know. 

The phone chimed with a text. Lizzie figured that if Gigi Darcy was anything like her brother, she would show up at her door if Lizzie didn’t respond soon. 

She read Gigi’s text; “William told me about last night. Please just let me know that you are OK. I understand if you don’t want to come tonight, but I really want you to.” 

Alright. Perhaps he hadn’t told her about the George-part of the evening. As she sat on the edge of her bed pondering how to respond, her doorbell rang. She got up and walked over to the door, looking out the peephole. George. Shit. 

“Lizzie, I saw the light was on. Let me in, please.”

No fucking way. If what Darcy had told her was true, she could end up in deep trouble if she let him in. She remained silent. 

“I just want to explain about last night. It was stupid of me to take you there. I just wanted to show Darcy that he hadn’t managed to ruin my life, not that he hasn’t tried his best.” 

George was silent for a little while, probably waiting to see if she would open up. How had Darcy ruined his life? Wasn’t George the wrongdoer in that relationship?

“I don’t know what lies he has fed you, but I am just asking you to hear my side of the story. Don’t let him poison you against me like that.” 

She couldn’t deny that she didn’t trust Darcy. No matter what kind of feelings she might have developed for the man, she was more and more beginning to think that they were for some kind of fantasy version of him. A version where he wasn’t a criminal. He had hurt her brother after all, there were no denying that. There was no forgetting it. His presence did affect her something crazy, but when she was away from him it was easier to remember that he was in fact a very bad guy. No matter how he made her feel when he was in close proximity to her, those were the facts. 

“Lizzie?” The voice brought her back. “Please just let me explain.” 

Lizzie made a decision, pre-dialled the number for emergency services on her phone just in case, and unlocked the door. 

George looked a little worn, but mostly his usual happy self. “Thank you. I just want a chance to explain what’s behind what happened last night.” 

“Okay, so explain. I have somewhere I need to be so I don’t have that much time.” If he believed that someone would be waiting for her, it might make it less likely that he’d try something. 

And so, George launched into a tirade about how his father had helped build the Darcy corporation from the ground. George admitted that his father hadn’t been exactly on the straight and narrow, and when Lizzie gave him a look that said she knew just how not straight and narrow Darcy was, George continued. “My father died working for the Darcy’s. I was even named after Darcy’s father, that’s how close my father was with his. I did some work for Darcy that I am not so proud of, but I felt like I was filling the hole left by my father. But then George Darcy died and I was turned out into the cold. Darcy even refused to let me see Georgiana. By then we had been seeing each other for almost a year.”

He was hardy going to admit to beating up his ex-girlfriend. But that didn’t mean that what had happened before then wasn’t true. Lizzie felt increasingly confused about the whole situation. 

“Was that the last time you saw her?”

“No. I tried to contact her for a while after, but she’d blocked my number. Darcy poisoned her against me. I saw her the night she graduated and asked her to explain why she’d suddenly turned against me, but she wouldn’t. I haven’t seen her since.” 

He seemed to have no problem leaving out the assault from the story. If she hadn’t known it already, she probably would have believed it all. This was however a golden opportunity for some insight into Darcy’s less than legal side. 

“What did you do when you worked for Darcy?”

“This and that. Mostly I was muscle when Darcy didn’t want to get his hands dirty. I’m actually surprised he just let me go when his old man died. I’d have thought he’d put a bullet between my eyes and be done with it. Perhaps his cousin Richard reigned him in, who knows.”

“Was Richard involved in Darcy’s business as well?” This was just getting weirder and weirder. What was he going to say next, that Gigi is a gun for hire?

“You know Richard?”

“Yes, we’ve met.” No need to mention the actual connection. 

“I believe he still is involved to the extent that Darcy’s businesses are all represented by Richards law firm.” Just then George’s phone rang. He stepped away and exchanged a few hushed words with someone on the other end. “I have to go. Thank you for listening to my side. At least now you know what kind of man he is. Do not be fooled, he will turn against you when you’re no longer useful to him.” With that George left her alone. She erased the emergency number from her phone and locked the door. 

She walked into her living room and sat down on the edge of her sofa. Darcy had not told her the whole story, that much she knew. And the part about Richard and the firm, how much was true? Lizzie supposed that it made sense, but Richard would never let his employees do anything illegal. At least not without their knowledge and consent. 

What was she supposed to do now with all this partial information? If she asked Darcy, would he tell the truth? Would he even care enough to respond at all? Asking Gigi was out; she would not bring up George to her. If there was one thing she did believe, it was what had happened to Gigi on the night of her graduation. But what about the pretty significant accusations against Darcy and what he had done to George? That had happened before the assault on Gigi. If she put pressure on Darcy with the information, would she still be safe? Or would he decide that she was becoming a nuisance and get rid of her? She had never seen herself as someone who could stand idly by while people got hurt, which left her with two out of an original three options. She could try to get as much information on Darcy and his enterprises as possible and turn it over to the authorities, thus taking down Darcy, Richard and Gigi in the process. Or, she could leave. Her uncle was still waiting for a definite response from her. If she took the job in Meryton she could leave all the confusion of Darcy and everything behind her for good. 

How had this happened to her? How was it that John had managed to drag her into this and somehow she was still stuck in it while he was on the fast track to a good life again? It wasn’t fair to blame him, and she didn’t really. It was just incredible to her how she hadn’t managed to get out like he had. How Darcy managed to pull her back as soon as she tried to put distance between their worlds. 

She picked up her phone and opened the text-conversation with Gigi. She responded “I’m fine, don’t worry. See you tonight.” 

It was three in the afternoon now and the gala began at nine, so there was plenty of time. It took Lizzie about forty-five minutes to navigate back to the club by foot. It had felt like a lot further when she had walked the same path with Darcy the night before. She hadn’t considered the possibility that the place might be closed in the middle of a Saturday afternoon until she arrived and saw nothing but darkness through the windows. She didn’t know if she expected to find him here, he was probably at home or at his office building. To her surprise the door into the club was unlocked and she opened it, careful not to make any noise. She couldn’t see or hear anyone, so she carefully walked towards the back where Darcy had taken her. She figured that she would remember the way to his office. Her plan was to look through the bookshelves and desk and try to find anything that either corroborated George’s story or disproved it. When she got closer to his office, she saw a light on inside and voices drifted out into the hallway. 

“Make sure he never gets in here again. He didn’t do any damage this time, but he’s unpredictable.” It was Darcy. Was he talking about George? 

“Will do boss. I’m sorry that he got in last night, I had a new guy on the door that did not recognise the lowlife.” Another voice said. She didn’t recognise it, but she figured he was club security or something. 

“No real harm done, just be more careful in the future. Have you put someone on Elizabeth Bennet yet?” Darcy again. What the hell did he mean by that?

“No, not yet. Are you certain you want around the clock surveillance on a girl? Do you think she’s a threat?” 

“If I say that I want her monitored, I mean it! It’s not for our safety, it’s for hers. Wickham thinks he can get to me through her now. Make sure whomever you pick is discreet. Preferably a woman.” Elizabeth would be less likely to spot a woman lurking around than a man. Wickham had too much information about them now, he was sure to do something stupid. 

“If you say so boss. She’s a pretty looking thing for sure, I can see why you’d want to have a go at that.”

Lizzie didn’t stick around to hear any more of the conversation. She couldn’t get the information she needed with them there, and she did not want to get caught sneaking around. Darcy may not hurt her, but he could still be terrifying when he wanted to be. 

Darcy rose from his seat and loomed over Jones, his head of security at the club. “Do you now?” Deep down he knew that Jones didn’t mean anything by his comment, but Darcy saw red. “Anything in particular you enjoy about her?”

“I meant no offence boss, she’s a pretty lass is all, I’m not blind.” Jones wasn’t a small guy, but faced with a pissed off Darcy, he wasn’t about to talk back.   
“She’s mine, and you’d do well to remember that. And remind anyone who might have missed it.” Darcy didn’t like the image of other men admiring Elizabeth, but of course he knew that she wasn’t his, not yet. 

Lizzie was trying to sort out the thoughts that fought for attention in her mind. Darcy was putting surveillance on her? She hadn’t been able to hear the last things they’d said clearly, so she couldn’t be sure why. Admittedly, she had just snuck into his club to rifle through his things, but still. She couldn’t stop him now because she wasn’t supposed to know about it, but she could try to find out who he had watching her and confront him with it then. This was absurd, how was this even happening to her? Darcy was so confusing. Why couldn’t anyone normal be interested in her? More importantly, why was she attracted to people who only meant trouble? That did not happen in real life. This is real life damn it! She should have made sure to get the number of that cute guy she danced with at the graduation party. 

George was supposed to be her ticket back to normality but no such luck. She had been single for most of her life, the occasional boyfriend had broken the droughts but it had been a while now and she was tired of it. The only two men who had shown even the slightest interest in her lately were comprised of one gangster and one abuser. Not really the stuff dreams were made of. Yet, Darcy kept nagging at the back of her mind. She could see his blue eyes when she closed hers. She had to forget him. If she couldn’t then she had to remember his bad parts first and foremost.


	12. Watching her leave

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I have been remiss in updating and responding to comments. I love you all for the continued support during my hiatus. Life has been (and still is) crazy hectic. I simply have not had the time to write anything. I know this is super short, but I wanted to give you something. It might be that the coming updates are short, but hopefully things will get better!
> 
> Also, soundtrack rec for this: Cold day in Heaven by Delta Rae

Lizzie had the dress, THE dress. It was several shades of blue in shimmering fabrics swirling around her. She had rarely felt so good thanks to a piece of clothing as she did now. She had decided to go to the gala and just enjoy herself. Gigi and Richard would be at her table and John would be there with Charlie so there was no shortage of friends at this shindig. She still couldn’t figure out what her relationship with Darcy was at this point, but she could not let some fantasy of a version of him rule her life. Handsome and intense might seem like good features in theory, but in reality they were only confusing. 

Lizzie had been perfectly happy considering herself single for a long time. But she could not deny that the idea of having someone to care about and who cared about her, for no other reason than that they enjoy being around each other and care for one another, appealed to her now more than ever before. And she really missed fun uncomplicated sex. She was pretty sure she could get her physical needs satisfied by any which one of the single people she’d meet tonight, or maybe even by Darcy. But at the same time, she wanted a connection that wasn’t going to be fleeting. Darcy’s attention was intense, but she had no doubt that his interest in her was limited in its duration. She was sure he would lose interest as soon as the chase got old. She was staring to think her own interest in him was not based in reality, and that was never good. 

 

The clock was nearing half past eight, Charlie and John was about to pick her up. She walked outside and was met by them at the curb where an Uber was idling. 

Charlie let out a low whistle. “Elizabeth Bennet, moments like this is how I know I am irrevocably gay. If I weren’t, you would have stolen my heart this very moment.”

“Seconded, kind of.” John agreed. “You look beautiful sis.” John could see that something was bugging Lizzie, but he wasn’t going to ask her about it when they were with company. If he didn’t know better, he would think that George-person had gotten under her skin. 

“Thank you, but John cannot be trusted on the subject of his favourite sister and you, Charlie, would never disagree with him.”

“Hey, I will have you know I am being entirely objective. You are objectively the most beautiful woman on earth. I cannot be blamed for being related to you.” 

Lizzie laughed, kissed her brother’s cheek and entered the Uber through the back door held open by Charlie. Being accompanied to a charity gala by two handsome men (even if they are as gay as the day is long) wasn’t a privilege afforded to a lot of people and she let herself be swept up in the feeling of extravagance. The escorts, the car, the dress, the flutes of champagne that were served to them as they arrived at the mansion where the gala was held. Lizzie felt properly and thoroughly spoiled for the first time in her life. A fleeting thought told her that life could have been like this every day had she accepted Darcy’s advances. No, of course it wouldn’t. He might show her a life like this, but he would have tired of his game, and of her, soon enough. 

She quickly squashed the thought but had only to turn around to be faced with him in real life. A living, breathing, handsome Darcy was suddenly right in front of her. Fuck. It seemed that thinking of him was enough to conjure him out of thin air. 

At first, she tried to think of something to say, but decided that he was the one in the wrong and thus should bear the burden of the conversation. If they had to have one. Also, he had approached her. She didn’t even want to see him. 

Her internal monologue was interrupted when her eyes accidentally met his and she spaced. Why goddamnit, why did he do this to her? Where was her sense of self-preservation? She would totally die first in the event of an apocalypse. 

“Elizabeth, I have to apologize for some things I said last night. I was…it is no excuse but everything that happened and what you told me, it became too much. There is no excuse for my behaviour. I hope that, at some point, you can forgive my thoughtless words. The last thing I want to do is cause you more pain.” His tone was formal, like he had practiced what to say and had to remember the words just right. 

She didn’t know what to say. Why should she keep this volatile man in her life? Someone who had contributed nothing good to it? The irrationality of the feelings he elicited in her with his mere presence confused her to no end. Had this happened to a friend of hers, she would have hoped that her friend would have the presence of mind to get out and get out now. She could theoretically understand that he’s merely human with human emotions and reactions, but she had not expected him to allow her to see it. To see his flaws that lay deeper than the obvious issues that had first brought them together. 

She wondered about what she had overheard earlier that afternoon. Had he already put someone on watching her? She hadn’t seen anyone, but she hardly expected to. It freaked her out a little that someone could just do that. Was it that he cared or that he wanted control? He had claimed it was for her protection, but that sounded an awful lot like control. She had never needed protection before he came along. She didn’t think she needed it now either. 

He was still standing in front of her, gazing into her eyes, trying to gauge her reaction but without luck. She realized that some time had passed without her saying anything, but she still couldn’t think of anything sensible to say. “Like I said last night, I don’t think we should be in each other’s company. It is not conductive to reasonable thinking for either one of us, apparently.” Her baser instincts wanted what they wanted, but she was a thinking creature and not a slave to her urges. So there. 

He looked hurt. How was it that someone could spend half of the time not showing a single emotion, and the other half looking like a kicked puppy? Then the steely façade came back, and he looked like he had in the beginning of their… whatever it was. 

“No, indeed. I wish you all the best on your new job in Meryton. I hope it will make you happy.” Why were they being so formal with each other? Darcy couldn’t figure out how he had so capitally screwed this up. Hadn’t they been so close to something just a mere two weeks ago? Had his petty jealousy really ruined his chances for good? 

“I hope so to; a fresh start should be good.” 

“I am sure you will excel at anything you set your mind to. You have good instincts, follow them, no matter what anyone else thinks.”

So, he felt guilty for being a dick. He should. “Thanks, I’ve got it covered. Look, I see Gigi over there so I’m going to go say hi. Have a good life Darcy.” 

A good life? She really did not plan to see him ever again? His heart was beating rapidly in his chest. She was lost. The only woman he had ever thought he might love was gone. He watched her saunter over to where his sister was standing. They exchanged a few words and then Lizzie headed towards the door. Gigi remained where she was, but her gaze was trained on him. Charlie and John were still there, so was Richard. John was watching Lizzie leave, and then looked to Darcy. John obviously blamed him for Lizzie’s abrupt exit. It seemed that all he ever did these days was watching her leave.


	13. Moving day

Lizzie did not take her new blue dress out of her wardrobe again until two months later when she packed it in a box with the rest of her clothes and loaded the box into her truck. The drive to Meryton wasn’t very long but she was chomping at the bit to get there and get away from the city. Gigi had helped her pack and was standing by the truck as Lizzie closed the back doors. John was already in the passenger seat, waiting for Lizzie to say goodbye. 

“I will miss you like crazy.” She said, shifting awkwardly from foot to foot. She could see Gigi’s eyes glaze and a tear made its way down her cheek. 

“Oh! I am going to miss you too. I promise we will see each other. God, just when I had gotten a best friend she goes and moves away.” Gigi wiped the tear away and held her arms out. Lizzie was quick to hug her back and they stood for a moment just holding on to their friendship. “I’m sorry you’re leaving, but I am so happy for you.” Gigi whispered. What had Lizzie done to deserve such a friend?

Gigi stepped back and nodded down the street to the place where Lizzie and Darcy had parted two months earlier. The two of them had not seen or spoken to each other since the gala. A black Range rover idled at the curb. The windows were tinted so Lizzie couldn’t make out who was in the car, but she assumed he was there to pick Gigi up. “He said it was best that he didn’t say goodbye, that you wouldn’t want him to.” 

Lizzie hesitated. She wanted him to. What she didn’t know was whether it was because she wanted to end things once and for all or because she wanted to feel like maybe they weren’t over just yet. Distance is only that, after all. It could be overcome. But he did not want her any more, the cold speech he had given her told her that much. It was so typical her to develop feelings just when the other person moved on. Besides, Darcy must have tons of women vying for his attention, he would forget her as soon as she was out of his sight. 

She knew very well how irrational she was being, of course. God, was it too much to say goodbye at least? But hadn’t she told him that they shouldn’t see each other? “Is he in that car or is that your driver?”

“It’s him.”

Of course it was. If he hadn’t come this would be easier. But he was there, a stone throw away. Maybe he wasn’t paying them any attention; he was only driving his sister after all. He might be reading his e-mail or planning something sinister for all she knew. 

As if he could sense her thoughts, or maybe he just caught her staring in his direction, he opened the car door and stepped out. He walked over to them, not really looking at her. “Georgiana, are you ready to go home?” He asked his sister. He was wearing the sunglasses again so she couldn’t see the expression in his eyes. His voice sounded detached. 

“No, not really.” She turned to Lizzie again with another tear threatening to break free. “I love you, you know. Don’t forget me.”

“How could I? I love you too, Gigi. Never forget. God, look at us. We sound as if I am going away to war or something. It’s only a couple of hours away.”

“Georgie…” Darcy urged his sister to get moving. He wanted to leave. It had been torture not to see her for two months, and now he would never see her again at all. He shouldn’t have gotten out of the car but he couldn’t help it. He had to commit her face to memory one last time. 

“Darcy, could I have a word with you before I go?” Darcy hadn’t expected that, and it made his stomach flip. Gigi hugged her once more before walking to the car. Darcy waited patiently for her to speak, hands in his pockets and staring at his shoes. 

“I just wanted to say I’m done, done holding a grudge, done being impossible about everything, done…”

“Stop. Please.” He held up a hand to stop her speech. “I just wanted to wish you a safe journey. Goodbye, Elizabeth.” With that, William Darcy turned on his heel and walked away. He didn’t want to hear her say she was done with him. He didn’t need to hear that. 

She couldn’t believe that he would not let her apologise for her erratic behaviour. He just turned his heel and left. He was indeed well and truly finished with whatever infatuation it was he’d had. Now it was only for her to find some way to bury her own feelings.


	14. One year later

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, multiple issues has kept me from writing over the summer and subsequent fall. Most recently my beloved seven year old Macbook Pro is having some hardware issues, and until they are fixed I am writing on its predecessor, a HP laptop from '05. It has Windows XP, people. X fucking P. It has been collecting dust on a shelf until I fired it back up for the first time in years. But it does have Word and as I was struck with a sudden bolt of inspiration and needed a writing machine, so it will have to do. 
> 
> Anywho, so sorry about all the waiting. Probably will happen again. SO, yeah. Have at it.

One year later…

Text from Lizzie: How are things? And do not tell me fine. 

Text from Gigi: They are in fact not fine. I have a terrible cold and have been forcibly put under house arrest at Will’s. 

Text from Lizzie: So that’s the reason I haven’t heard anything but “just fine” from you for the past month. You little liar. 

Text from Gigi: I have not been sick a month. More like three weeks. It’s really getting better. Probably going to work on Monday. Who told on me, anyway?

Text from Lizzie: Well, John said that Will had been complaining to Charlie about your stubbornness. Also Richard said something about it the other day. 

Text from Gigi: Snitches. 

Text from Lizzie: They are worried, as they should be. Have you even seen a doctor?

Text from Gigi: Nah, it’s just a stubborn cold. I told you it’s getting better. 

Text from Lizzie: I can’t believe Will is letting you get away with this. Of all the times to be an overbearing ass, this is the one. 

Text from Gigi: Why don’t you talk to him, maybe the two of you can come up with some scheme to kidnap me to the doctor’s. 

Text from Lizzie: No need. If you are not better next week, and I will know if you are, I will come there and take you myself. 

Text from Gigi: Spoilsport. Also, I will get better. Like tomorrow. 

Text from Lizze: Get some sleep Gigi, I am begging you. 

Text from Gigi: Alright. Goodnight mother. 

Text from Lizzie: Goodnight sweetheart. 

 

Darcy House, same night. 

 

“Who are you texting with such fervour?” Will had brought some hot tea for Gigi, who was curled up in the corner of the sofa with three blankets. 

“Lizzie. She found out I’m sick. I tried to keep her in the dark, she gets kinda worried.” The effort to speak made her cough several times. 

“Oh. Well, I’m worried too. We really need to take you to the doctor. That does not sound like just a cold any more. You might have pneumonia.”

“I do not.” Coughing again. 

“You are a grown up now, no matter how I feel about it. You can make your own decisions. But sometimes you can be too flippant about things.” 

What Gigi hadn’t told anyone was that she is not only suffering from a bad cold, but also from a bad case of being scared of the doctor. She was a bit ashamed about it, a grown woman being scared of the doctor, what nonsense really. But nonetheless, she was. Not even Will knew. She thought about telling Lizzie, but Lizzie was hardly afraid of anything. She wouldn’t understand. No, this cold would give in like every other. It is just taking its sweet time. 

It was Wednesday evening now, by Monday she would be perfectly healthy again. 

 

Darcy House, Monday morning

 

Will stood in the doorway to Gigi’s bedroom. At the moment, Gigi was having a coughing fit from trying to tell will that she’d be staying home one more day, max. It was getting worse. He had a suspicion that Gigi was avoiding the doctor for more reasons than it being a drag to book a time and go over there amongst all the sick people. But he didn’t want her to feel worse than she already did by questioning her about it. He called Richard when he had gone downstairs. 

“Morning Will, how is the patient?”

“Getting worse and still refusing to see a doctor.” 

“I don’t know what you want from me, if you can’t get her to go, I certainly can’t.” 

“No, but I think I know who might be able to, and I need her address from you.”

“Why don’t you just call her?”

“I doubt she’d pick up the phone. But if I went there and asked her to help with Gigi, she’d never say no.” 

“I think you’re right, but I talked to her just the other day, when I told her about Gigi being sick. She’s in the middle of this big lawsuit against her new firm, a malpractice suit. I think she might be a little busy.”

“A malpractice suit? Against her?”

“No, I don’t think it’s her specifically, but the team that she works with. It’s bad enough that she seems pretty stressed out. From what I gathered, some new hire thought he was in a tv-show and tried to make a deal with opposing counsel without talking to his team and thereby let confidential information leak. He was being played of course, but it lost them the case and has now brought this down on them from their former client.”

“She never should have left your firm. God, those incompetent idiots. She’s going to have that shit shadowing her for a long time.” 

“Up until this happened, she’s been really happy. I’m sure it’s just a bump in the road, she’ll own that place in no time.”

“Are you going to give me the address or what?” 

“Aren’t you all-knowing? How can you not have it already?”

“She’s not listed. Her mail gets sent to her office, not her home.”

“Ah, that is problematic. Are you going to do something to upset her life?”

“No Richard, I am not. I just need her help with Gigi. That is all, it’s been a year for crying out loud, I am not in any danger of falling in love with her again just by seeing her for a couple of days.” 

“You are though. If you ever fell out of love with her. She just doesn’t need the extra burden right now.”

“The address Richard, please.” 

“Fine, it’s 22 Holland Road, Meryton. Don’t say or do anything stupid.”

But Will had hung up after “road”. 

Will didn’t go right away. Gigi probably wasn’t dying just yet, so he gave it one more week. He figured that Lizzie probably couldn’t just take of for a week without notice, especially if they were having a bit of a crisis at work. But he hoped that he could persuade her to come back to London for the weekend. 

 

Friday afternoon, 22 Holland Road, Meryton. 

 

Darcy found himself in the front garden of a small stone cottage, surrounded by wild flowers and cherry trees. On the wall beside the door hung the number 22 in brass, it was quaint, he supposed. This is where she lives now, just like she said, in a small countryside cottage. If this was what she wanted for herself, he could see why the relative grandeur of Darcy house didn’t appeal to her. Not to mention what she’d think of Pemberley. 

He took a deep breath and walked up to the door. He steeled himself once more and used the brass knocker to make his presence known. She did not have a doorbell. A few moments passed without a sound, but then he heard her from inside. “Coming!” 

She pushed the door open with one hand, carrying a load of clean laundry with the other, leaning the basket against her hip. “Sorry, I was down in the basem…” she trailed off when she saw who it was on the other side of her door. 

“Hello Lizzie.” He was wearing the sunglasses. His voice didn’t give away any emotion. 

“Hi…William, what a surprise, I…what, sorry. Why are you here?” She thought about how she must look for about a second, sweats and messy hair, doing the laundry. Then she quickly decided it fucking didn’t matter. He was intruding on her. 

“I got the address from Richard, if you were wondering. It’s about Gigi. Richard told me he had told you about her, being sick.”

“Yes, Gigi has also spilled the proverbial beans. I take it you can’t get her to see a doctor?” 

“No, I can’t. That’s why I’m here, to ask you to help me, well, her.”

Lizzie put down the basket on the bench in her small hallway and motioned for him to come in and follow her to the kitchen. He sat down next to her, at the end of the table, so he was at an angle towards her. “I think she’s scared to go to the doctor” Lizzie said. 

“Well, it’s unpleasant for everyone, that’s no reason…” 

“No, I mean like really scared, like a phobia. A crippling fear. She hasn’t said so, but it makes sense. It’s pretty common, too.” 

“Do you think you could help? Could you persuade her?” 

“I can try, no promises obviously. But I think the best thing might be to get a doctor to come to your house.” 

“I asked if she wanted that, but she said no.”

“Of course she did, but we have to make her understand that she doesn’t have a choice any more.” 

“I wanted to come last Monday, but I figured you were working so I waited until now. Can you come with me tonight?” 

She didn’t want it to seem like she had nothing to do on a Friday night, but he had already seen her in sweats doing the laundry, so the fish in that particular barrel had already been shot. Also, obviously Gigi’s health was the most important; she would have cancelled any plans she might have had. She just wish she had some to cancel. But the truth was that the most fun she’d had in Meryton on a Friday night was when there were re-runs of Jeopardy on TV. The town was dead, and she hardly knew anyone under the age of 70. That seemed to be the average age in this place. 

“Yes, of course. I just need to pack a few things. And I will need to go back on Sunday evening.” 

“No problem, I’ll take care of it. I’ll just wait in the car for you.”

“Ok, I’ll just be a few minutes.” Will got up and walked out to his car. Lizzie remained seated at the table for a few moments, contemplating what the fuck was happening. How was he in her kitchen suddenly, a whole year later, acting like nothing had ever happened? Was that how he was going to play this, pretending like nothing ever happened and hope for the best? Well, if that’s what he wants, so be it. 

She could bloody well pretend too.


	15. I should have forgotten how I felt about you by now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters in two days! Talk about regular updating ;) 
> 
> I really appreciate all the feedback! I know I left you guys hanging for quite a while. Just goes to show how awesome you all are for sticking with it (and me)!
> 
> Song rec: Bound to you - Jocelyn Alice, Animal - Andrew Ripp.

The drive had taken him about two hours from London to Meryton. He wasn’t sure if he was hoping to make it back as quickly as possible or if he wanted something to slow them down, so he could have more time to formulate what to say to her. Or just more time to spend sitting next to her. 

“So, how bad is it?” Lizzie asked. 

Depended on what she meant. His longing to reach out and take her hand was excruciating. Gigi’s condition however, which was probably what she was asking about, he couldn’t say. 

“I’m not sure, she’s been out of it for a month now. Even a bad cold would be over by now. I think it might be pneumonia.” 

“Is she alone tonight?”

“No, another friend of hers, Annesley, is there watching movies with her.”

“Oh… good.” She was out of questions. He might have given her a little notice. She could have come up with a list of appropriate neutral subjects. As it was, she was at a loss for something to say. “So, why didn’t you just call me? I could have come right after work. You didn’t have to drive all this way…”

“Honestly? I didn’t think you’d pick up. I figured if I asked you in person, you’d at least hear what I had to say.” 

“Right, so you don’t have amnesia then.” Let’s face it; she was never good at pretending. She wanted everything out in the open. Deep down she wanted some sort of closure for all the time and everything that happened since that first fateful night, right up until she moved away. He probably wouldn’t give it to her, especially if it made him seem vulnerable. 

“Amnesia?” He wasn’t going to engage in this battle of wills with her, he had promised Richard. But if she brought it up…

“It just seemed like you didn’t remember anything that happened in London.”

“I guess I have just moved on. I would have thought you had too.” He hadn’t, of course, but there was no need to let her know that she still held power over him.

“I have. I mean of course I have. But pretending like it never happened is just going to make the elephant in the room stomp its feet.” 

“Alright, so we had something, at least I thought so. But then it was decided that it wasn’t something to pursue. Now you are my sister’s best friend, and that is all there is to it.”

“Masterly use of the passive voice.” It was decided, my ass. Lizzie hadn’t decided anything of the sort. Well, in the beginning, and probably middle too, but in the end he was the one to cut her off. Ok, so she had said they shouldn’t spend time together, but she had tried to apologise for it, and HE cut her off. So obviously everything was entirely his fault. Yes, that was reasonable. 

After that the car was silent for half an hour. But then curiosity got the best of Will and he had to ask. 

“Richard told me about the malpractice suit. How are you doing with all that?”

She sighed. “Does Richard not keep anything to himself?”

“No. To be fair he only told me to keep me from going to see you.” 

She wondered if he did see her through those sunglasses. They were really beginning to annoy her. 

“What?” Was Richard playing some sort of anti-matchmaker? 

“He figured you were too busy and I shouldn’t bother you.” Oh. 

“I think Gigi’s health is more important than a problem at work.”

“A problem you wouldn’t have if you had stayed in London.” He mumbled it while he turned up the volume a little on the radio. 

“Come again?” If he was going to be passive aggressive, she wasn’t having it. 

“You wouldn’t have to deal with that kind of incompetence in London. You shouldn’t have left.” 

“I had to.”

“No, you really didn’t. Your family is dragging you down.” 

“Why do you get to have an opinion on my family?”

“Come on, it’s obvious. John drags you down with him, then your uncle. Who’s next, one of your sisters? Your parents?”

“Hey! You do not get to throw dirt on my family like that. You have no idea what happened at work. And John I think we’ve hashed enough already. As for the rest of my family, you haven’t even met them! You have no idea!”

“I know that John is your favourite sibling. And considering what a mess he used to be, I can only imagine what the rest are like.” 

“That would be like judging Gigi based on you, and let me tell you, if I had done that I would never even have given her a chance. You might want to tone down the judgement.” 

“Alright, I was wrong to assume. I only meant that you seem to find yourself in bad situations, and the cause has been your family. You can’t deny that.” 

“I can. I found myself in a bad situation last year because of you, not because of John. John was a victim. As for my uncle, it was hardly his fault that a new employee decided to go solo and fuck everything up.” 

“I guess we will have to agree to disagree.” 

“Obviously.” 

“I can’t win with you.” 

“No, guess not.” How he planned on winning her over by insulting her family, she did not know. 

The rest of the ride was carried out in silence. Will was mad at himself for always managing to fuck up everything he said to her. He was mad at her for not understanding what he meant. 

Lizze was mad at him for making her question herself. He had no right to give his opinion on her family and her choices. It was a sucky opinion too. She was mad at herself for caring about what he thought. 

An indeterminable amount of time later, they arrived outside Darcy House. 

When they entered they found two women asleep on the sofa. The woman Lizzie assumed was Annesley woke up when they turned the light on. 

“Hi, god we must have fallen asleep during the movie.” She looked over towards Gigi, who was managing to sleep quite soundly for once. “I’ll just go home, let her sleep.” Annesley said and rose from the sofa. 

“I can drive you,” Will offered. 

“Thanks, but that’s alright, you have a guest to get settled. I’ll get an Über. Hi, I’m Annesley by the way.” She extended a hand towards Lizzie with a warm smile. 

Lizzie took it and returned the smile. She didn’t know Annesley, but she liked her already. “Lizzie.” 

“I hope you can get a doctor to her, she’s been coughing all night.”

“I’ll try my best, thank you for staying with her.” 

“No problem, what are friends for, hey?” 

“Exactly! I hope we will get to know each other better as well in the future.” Lizzie said.

“So do I. Well, I gotta bounce, there’s an Über three minutes from here! Good luck!”

“Goodbye!”

 

When Annesley had left, Will showed Lizzie to her room and left her to unpack. On the way up they had decided that it was best to leave Gigi asleep, even if she would get a neck cramp the next day. According to Will she hadn’t slept so soundly for weeks. 

It was a little early to sleep, only a little past eight. Lizzie had brought a book so she could excuse herself as tired and spend the night reading and that is exactly what she did. Will might have seen through her scheme, but she didn’t care. 

The next morning Lizzie made her way to the kitchen and made a cup of tea and a bit of toast. At some point during the night Gigi had moved from the sofa up to her room, but she seemed to be asleep now. She had no idea where Will was. Perhaps he was still asleep as well, it was only seven in the morning, but somehow she had imagined him as a morning person. They are the most annoying after all. Right on cue, a William Darcy clad in only sweatpants entered the kitchen. His hair was all over the place, he wore glasses and he hadn’t shaved. She had never seen him with glasses before, if you excepted the sun variety. She had never seen him without a shirt either. There was only one word for it. Damn. Damn damn damn. Of course he looked like that, because why would life decide to be fair now? The shadow on his face didn’t exactly make him worse-looking. 

He stopped when he noticed that he wasn’t alone. She hadn’t turned on the lights so he probably assumed there was no one else up. He held a t-shirt in his hand, and quickly pulled it on. Well, that gave her a view of the gun-show as well. DAMN. 

“Lizzie, sorry, I thought I was alone.” 

“Hey, no need to apologise. Your house...” She had to admit that she was a little speechless. That whole thing was going to give her a complex. 

“Have you found everything you want? There’s cereal in that cupboard…” He pointed behind her. 

“I’m good, thanks.” 

“Alright, I’m going to fry up some bacon and eggs. I worked out earlier, hence the whole…” He gestured to himself. “If you want any, just say so.” 

She wanted some alright.


	16. Why does her smoldering eyes still scorch my soul?

She suddenly realised that she must have been staring at him because he was giving her a funny look as he stretched to get a plate from a high shelf. 

She should be able to look past such a basic thing as physical attraction. It didn’t change the fact that they had never managed to have a normal conversation or done anything remotely ordinary together. There had always been an edge to everything, an unpleasant reason why they were in the same place and interacting at all. This time it was Gigi’s illness. He hadn’t come to see her for her, only to help his sister. She had to remember all that. 

Even so, she could not deny that it was interesting seeing him with his guard down. He wasn’t hiding behind his Ray-Bans now. It seemed strange that just yesterday his walls had been up from the second she answered the door, but this morning he hadn’t even bothered to shield himself with clothing. 

“I’m just going to go check if Gigi is up” She made a vague wavy motion towards the door that led from the kitchen to the hallway and the staircase to the second floor. She had to do something. Wasn’t this what happened in every Harlequin novel ever? The heroine can’t reconcile the hero’s vulnerability with whatever side of him it was she had been shown before? Well, her life wasn’t some trashy fucking novel. So there. 

“She’s not. I checked before I came in here. I think she took a couple of sleeping pills when she was up during the night. She’s been exhausted.”

“Right.” Lizzie sat back down, so much for the escape plan. “So I suppose maybe we should work out what our game plan is. Do you have a regular doctor you go to or something like that?” 

“No. Not really. We did as kids, but as you can imagine Gigi does not frequent the doctor’s office. I haven’t been in much need of any medical assistance lately either. But I have contacted a few that have been recommended to me. I don’t know if gender matters, but a couple are female.”

“I don’t think it matters, if it is a fear of doctors then it is probably all doctors. But I think it will help if they come here. It will be easier and she doesn’t have to make the effort to get there. Any ideas about which doctor you like the best?”

“A couple of them seem fine. One was recommended by Caroline, so I crossed that one off the list right away. One is my aunt’s physician, so he’s not an option. But my executive assistant has a niece who is a GP, and they are a good, decent family. I thought about hiring her.”

“Okay. One, who is Caroline? Two, why do you hate your aunt? Three, I’m surprised you are willing to slum it with the help.” 

He actually laughed. Like a warm, genuine laugh. She was a little shocked. He really needed to stop this “normal” act he had going on this morning. 

“Caroline Bingley is Charlie’s sister. She’s a quite well known shoe designer with a boutique in Soho. She’s also insane. My aunt is Caroline but from a different time, except that she would never degrade herself by an association to trade. And I will have you know that my assistant has been with the family for decades. She is a valued employee and friend. You’ve spoken to her I believe. Mrs. Reynolds.”

“Oh, yes I remember. But, just for clarification, why is Caroline insane? I only ask because if John and Charlie keep up this thing they’ve got going, I might run in to her at some point. It’s always good to be prepared.” 

“I…Well, I don’t know if everyone would say she’s insane, but she’s been trying to get in my pants since she was old enough to know how. She does not know the meaning of the word “no”. She’s even started to hint at wanting to get married. We’ve hardly spent five minutes alone together, by my design.” 

This time it was Lizzie’s turn to laugh. 

“I don’t even feel sorry for you. I think it is highly likely that you both deserve each other. Imagine the posh kids you’d have.” 

“That is too cruel a fate to wish on anyone. If she were a man, and I a woman, you would not be so quick to laugh.”

“No, you are right, I wouldn’t. Still, knowing how repressed and indeed judgemental you can be, is it possible that you have written her off based on prejudices rather than actual experience of the person herself? I mean, you said yourself you’ve hardly spoken to her. How do you know? Does she know about you? You know, like your extra curricular activities?”

“No, she does not. She thinks I am a rich entrepreneur in a suit, like any other. I’m not sure why she has singled me out for torture, but it is what it is. And I am not intimidated if that is what you are trying to get at, I just don’t like her.” 

“I’d like to meet her some day. I think she might be fantastic. But to return to the doctor thing, I think you should go with your gut and call the one related to Mrs. Reynolds.”

“You just want to change the subject because you lost the moral high ground.”

“I can live with that. The knowledge that you have a you after you is hilarious.” By now she had managed to get the cereal box down from the cupboard and poured a bowl. She had to have something to occupy her hands with if she could not escape engaging in some dangerous banter with him. 

“Come again?”

“Caroline is to you what you used to be to me, and she’s after you like you used to be after me. A taste of your own medicine.” 

“Now wait a minute. I refuse to be compared to Caroline when you haven’t even met her. You don’t know of what you are speaking. And indeed, if I am her, and you are me in this scenario, by your own logic you have not given me a chance. Also you called yourself repressed and judgemental, just saying.” 

Lizzie sighed. It was clear that she had met her match. Never had she had to work so hard to make a man give up his argument. “You are to smart to outwit. I am used to men who I can outwit with my wits tied behind my back.”

“You are used to the wrong men.” He put it very matter-of-factly; she couldn’t detect even a hint of, well, anything. 

“Can we press pause on this thing and get back to the matter at hand?” 

“Hey, you brought it up. I only defended myself.”

“Yes, alright. Can we leave it now, please?” 

“Sure. I’m going to call the GP. Could you go and wake her up and work your magic?”

“Yes, indeed I can.” 

So they both left the kitchen, a half-eaten plate of eggs and bacon accompanied an almost full bowl of cereal left behind on the table. 

 

Lizzie headed up the stairs and was met by Gigi at the top. 

“I heard shouting.” She said. 

“Not shouting, just very animated discussing.” 

“I am happy you are here Lizzie, but I don’t see why. I’m hardly dying.” Gigi was very much not her usual animated self. Rather a hoarse shadow of her usual state of being. 

“You don’t have to be dying to see a doctor. It is preferable in fact to see one before dying becomes a possibility. Also you don’t have to be dying to have friends come visit.”

“William went and got you last night, didn’t he? I knew he wasn’t going to “work late”, lamest excuse ever.” 

“Yes. He’s very worried.” Lizzie steered Gigi towards a couple of comfy chairs and sat her down in one. She then pulled another one close in front and gave Gigi a stern look. “I think I have figured out the problem. We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want, but nonetheless, you are about to be exposed to some CBT-therapy, alright?”

“I don’t want to.”

“Only father Christmas cares about what you want.” 

“I’m too ill to go outside.”

“Oh? I thought you weren’t all that ill? And no matter because you are not going outside, a doctor is coming here.”

Gigi looked like she might try to make a break for it.

“I will fucking tackle you.” Lizzie gave her a look that conveyed how much she meant it. “Full on rugby tackle, into the fucking dirt.” 

“When?”

“Not sure, Will is calling her now. Today or tomorrow, because after that I have to go back home.” 

“I think I need to go back to sleep.” 

“I can bring up some toast if you want?”

“Yeah, that would be great, thank you. And thank you for caring enough to come.”

“Of course I care enough, stupid. But it should have been enough that your brother cares. You have made him very worried. I can see the stress on his face.”

“It’s nice that you care about him too.” 

“I…well, I…” She really couldn’t think of something to say. 

“You should visit John while you’re here. Honestly I mostly lay down and half-sleep all day, I am no company. Also if you could possibly get Will to quit stressing, that would be good too.”

“He’ll quit when you get help.”

“Well, it seems I have little choice in the matter.”

“None, in fact.”

“Well then, I am off to sleep again. Wake me when the butcher comes.”

“Will do.”

Gigi got up and went back into her room. Lizzie was a little lost on what to do now. Would it be weird if she just hid in her room for a while? John wouldn’t be up for a while yet. If she went downstairs she would almost certainly have to face off with Will again. He seemed determined to argue with her today. But she had promised Gigi some toast. Downstairs it is. 

 

Will had also returned to the kitchen. He had put his plate in the microwave, but thrown out her cereal. He saw her searching for the bowl with her eyes. “It had gone way to soggy. Have a new one.”

“I promised Gigi toast.” 

They both went about their business for a couple of minutes, Lizzie pouring new cereal and putting bread in the toaster. Will spent the time basically just leaning against the wall waiting for the micro to ping. He spent his time watching her. It struck him how much he wanted this to be normal for them. How much he wanted every morning in this kitchen to include her. It was a cruel fate to fall in love with someone who seemed to if not hate, then at least thoroughly dislike him. 

“How did the call go with the doctor?”

“It went well, she was busy today but she can come tomorrow at ten. Is Gigi prepared?”

“Yes, I threatened her. She’s compliant now.”

Will did not want to know the details of how she managed that. 

“She said she is planning to sleep all day, so we don’t have to babysit.”

“Ok…do you have anything you want to do?”

“She suggested I go and see John, so I thought I might do that.”

“Charlie and I have a tennis match a little later; John will probably come to that.” 

“Oh, two birds with one stone then. If you don’t mind me watching, that is.” 

“No, I don’t mind at all. I’ll call Charlie to confirm the hour.” 

 

A couple of hours later Lizzie found herself at a private club with Will. Coming towards them from the other side of the parking lot were three people. Her brother and Charlie were joined by another person whom she could only assume, by the shoes and the striking similarity with Charlie, was Caroline Bingley.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had planned to throw Caroline in there a lot earlier, but she decided the time was now.


	17. A tale of tennis, fancy kicks and virtual reality

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am going on a business trip to Stockholm for a few days. It's only a couple of hours away but I do not plan on carrying this dinosaur of a computer with me. So no updating for a few days, but I will respond to any comments on my phone. I hope to begin the next chapter tonight but it probably won't be finished before I leave. Have an amazing week you gorgeous people!

John stretched out his arms towards his sister and embraced her when they met. “Hi there little sis.” He ruffled her hair a little and smiled his big goofy smile. Charlie and Caroline hung back a little, letting the siblings say hello. Will did the same. 

“Hey, god it’s been forever.” Lizzie felt herself choke up. She missed John so much, but with work being crazy, she’d hardly had any time to see him lately. 

“Nah, only a couple of months. Not so bad, is it?” He could hear it in her voice that she was feeling sad, and he felt the same. But he had Charlie and other friends here. He even hung out with Charlotte from time to time. To be honest he’d hardly had time to miss his sister, but the longing to see her bubbled up from now and again. John tightened the embrace around his sister, hiding her from view a little longer while she collected herself. 

Will observed them and wondered how much she had been hiding about how she felt about her move. 

She stepped away after a little while and quickly wiped a stray tear away before anyone saw, then plastered a smile on. “Hi Charlie!” She hugged him too, and then turned towards the other woman. “Hi, Elizabeth Bennet.” She held her hand out. 

“Caroline Bingley, pleasure.” She took the hand and shook it firmly. 

“It’s nice to meet you finally, I have heard a lot about you lately.” Lizzie shot a look towards Will, who pretended not to notice. 

“Not all bad, I hope.” She had seen the look, and knew it wasn’t John who had talked about her to his sister, but William who had for some reason talked about her to his sister’s friend. 

“No, of course not. But I take little stock in second hand information when it comes to what other people are like. I prefer to find out for myself if possible.” It was hard to gauge what Caroline was like. She played her cards close to her chest it seemed. 

“Well, we will have plenty of time for first hand information while the boys play. Do you play tennis?” 

“No, I’m not good with sports when balls fly everywhere. But I’m sure it will be interesting to watch.”

“No, I find it deadly dull to watch. But we can take a table next to the court and have a few drinks and talk instead.”

“Right, well sure.” Lizzie had no idea what to make of this. John had already found a table while Will and Charlie had gone to change clothes. Lizzie was not comfortable in this kind of environment. There were posh people everywhere, servers bringing drinks while wives (she assumed) watched husbands play assorted sports. There were women playing too of course, but they did not seem to have husbands waiting in the wings for them to finish. 

Was it this kind of life people like Will and Gigi wanted to have? Spending weekends at the club looking pretty or playing a bit of tennis with some CEO you do business with. Does Gigi play tennis? She didn’t even know. 

Lizzie decided to pretend she knew basically nothing about Caroline. “So, what do you do?”

Caroline gave her a look that said nice try. “None of that.” She looked around to see where John had got to, but couldn’t see him anywhere. She took the opportunity to find out what this Elizabeth was made of. “What is the thing with you and William?”

“Excuse me?”

“Don’t play coy. I know there’s something. I’ve been trying to get with him on and off for years. I need to know if there is any point anymore or if he’s taken for good.”

“He told me as much actually.”

“So he does know. He can be so stone-faced there’s no way to tell if he even knows you’re there.” Lizzie had never had that experience. Every time they were in the same room she could feel him observing her. 

“So why do you like him?”

“Like him? I don’t, really. But he’s hot, he’s rich and he can be pretty decent from time to time. There are worse men in our social circle.” Caroline said all this like it was nothing, like she expected no kind of mutual affection from a future partner. It was a little sad. “I bet he’s good between the sheets too.” She added, as an afterthought. 

“Oh. That’s, well, it’s good that you’re honest. But you shouldn’t base your choice on giving up or sticking with it based on me or anyone else. You should talk to him about it. He’s the only one who can tell you definitely yes or no.”

“So I take it you’re not together?” 

“No.” Not at the moment. 

“Alright then, enough talk about him. Let’s talk about you. Are you straight?”

“Wow, you are at least straightforward.” It was the first time Lizzie had ever gotten that question. Where the hell had John got to?

“And what is the answer?”

“I guess it doesn’t really matter. I care more about the person, man or woman. Why do you ask?”

“That’s a roundabout way to say bi. I am too, but it is still a bit frowned upon in these circles. People are pretty narrow-minded in the upper circles of society. I just got this feeling about you, so I had to see. I knew Charlie was gay from the moment he could do more than lie in a cradle. But somehow, around here, it is more common with gay men than women. I have not seen one female couple in this club since I became a member.” 

Just then all three men returned. “What are you ladies talking about?” Charlie asked. 

Before Lizzie could give Caroline a look that said shut up, Caroline opened her mouth “the sexuality of people in the upper tiers of society and around this table, also about your sexual awakening at the tender age of two.” Blabbermouth. 

“Caroline, why do you insist on asking everyone you meet about their sexuality?” Charlie’s exasperated tone of voice hinted at him being a little tired of the subject. 

“Because it’s interesting, and I felt my gaydar beep the moment I laid eyes on her.” 

Wills eyes went wide. Why hadn’t she just told him if she was gay? Even John looked a little surprised. 

Lizzie saw their reactions and had to put the record straight. “Oh my god, I am not gay. If anything I don’t subscribe to a type, alright? I’m good with anything, are you guys alright with that!?” 

Will visibly relaxed, John and Charlie laughed a little and Caroline looked smug. “I was half-right” she said. 

“Do you cause this kind of stir with every new person you meet?” Lizzie asked Caroline. 

“If I can, what fun is life without a little stir?” 

Before now, Lizzie hadn’t noticed the clothes that Charlie and Will had changed into. They each wore a pastel coloured shirt and white shorts. Short shorts. She burst out in a fit of giggles. 

“What? My arse looks good in these!” Charlie boasted. John hummed in agreement. “Hey, my arse looks good too!” Will exclaimed. 

“It sure does.” Caroline agreed. 

But before Will and Charlie could begin playing, a man approached Will. 

“Darcy” he greeted and they shook hands. “Got time for a word?” Will shot a glance at Lizzie, but she had started talking to Caroline about something. “I was about to play a game. John, would you mind taking this?” That got Lizzie’s attention. 

When John left with the mystery man, Lizzie pulled Will aside. “What the fuck was that?” Had Will pulled John back into his shit?

“I asked John to talk to a client because Charlie and I have a game to play, and we don’t have the court all day.” No shit Sherlock. 

“I could see that, the question is why is he talking to one of YOUR clients?”

“Because he works with us, I thought he’d told you.” 

“No, he hasn’t told me. What kind of work and for how long?”

“Not the kind of work you’re thinking of. It’s all above board. A few months now, he’s doing well. He’s not at all as hopeless as I first thought. 

“You were dumping all over John just yesterday.”

“I was not. I said that he used to be a mess. Not any more.” 

Charlie tried to get their attention and pointed towards the court. It was their turn. 

“We will talk about this later when we get home.” She told him. 

She was pissed off; there was no doubt about that. He might have to do a bit of grovelling later. 

So, after what felt like a bit of a circus, Will and Charlie played a game of tennis while Lizzie and Caroline half watched but mostly had drinks and talked about the deep stuff. John took his sweet time to come back, but when he did, he joined them at the table and ordered a drink of his own. 

“I am telling you, I wouldn’t.” Lizzie was adamant. 

“Of course you would, there is no reason not to.” This might be the most fun Caroline had had in a good long while. 

“Yes there is, you might want an end at some point. How are you supposed to communicate that you want to be switched off?” 

“Maybe they have people uploaded that you can tell if you want to be deleted.” 

“I don’t follow at all.” John said. 

“Lizzie claims that she wouldn’t want her consciousness uploaded into a huge server and live forever in a fictional place when she dies. I call bullshit.” 

“It is not bullshit; I think you would get tired of it real quick.” 

“You can choose any time period, how in the world would you get tired of it? You’re not tired of living the way you are now, in one place, so why would you there where you can switch decade ever so often?”

“How is this even a subject for conversation?” John was confused. 

“It references an episode of Black mirror, it’s a TV-show. And I think a lot of people would opt-out.” 

“Alright, let’s ask Will and Charlie when they are done. I bet they both agree with me.” Caroline said. 

“How much do you bet?”

“Not money. If I win, you have to tell me exactly what is going on between you and Will.”

“And if I win?”

“I’ll make you some kick-ass kicks. You can’t walk around London in off the rack sneakers. Not if you’re moving back.”

Lizzie had googled Caroline’s designs this morning. She had to admit they looked awesome, but the price was insane.

“Who said I’m moving back?”

“No one, I just assumed. I heard the firm you work for is a veritable Titanic. Figured you were smart enough to jump ship. I know you used to work for Richard, I’m sure he’d have you back.”

“No, I don’t really have any plans like that. But you’re on about the bet. I could use some fancy kicks.”


	18. All bets are off

Elizabeth couldn’t be sure, of course, but she was still fairly convinced that Will would share her point of view in this matter. She was sure that Caroline already knew what Charlie’s answer would be, or she wouldn’t be so convinced she’d win. They continued talking about this TV-show that had become an obsession for both of them, leaving John a little bit left out. Fortunately, it was time for the last round in the tennis match and Charlie managed to keep the ball just inside the lines as Will threw himself to catch it, but too late. It was a narrow win but a win nonetheless for Charlie. The three at the table clapped and whistled as Charlie bowed towards them and accepted the applause. Will clapped him on the bum with his racket as he went past, “come on you goofball, I need a shower.” 

Twenty minutes later, the two men returned and joined the table. This was it; it was time to settle the bet. 

“Lizzie and I have a bet, and you two will decide the outcome.” Caroline announced. 

They looked at each other and then back at Lizzie and Caroline. “What kind of a bet?” Charlie asked. 

“The stakes are of no interest to either of you. All you have to do is answer a question yes or no. Understood?” 

“Yes.” Will decided he would ask for details later. He had a bad feeling that Lizzie and Caroline got on just a bit too well. They had only known each other for a few hours and were already making bets with one another? 

“If, when you die, you had the option to let you consciousness live on in a server so it would seem to you like you live in a lovely seaside town in any modern decade you like. Would you do it? You could be reunited with loved ones and live together forever, or you could feel trapped there forever. We do not know if there is any way to be switched off. Yes or no?

“No”  
“Yes!”

They answered at the same time. Lizzie gave a squeak of happiness. “You owe me some new shoes!” 

“Did you know he was going to answer like that?” Caroline looked suspicious.

“I guessed. I figured you would know Charlie’s answer, but I put my money on Will to save me.” 

“Yes, quite the knight in shining armour that one.” Caroline was a little bummed that she wouldn’t get the inside scoop on their relationship from a first hand source. But she decided she would try to pry it out of John instead, later. 

“So, if you get new shoes, what would she have gotten?” Will asked. 

“Just some…information, but no worries, I can go without.” Caroline had considered outing the other stake, but decided against it. She knew deep down that her goal of securing her future by marrying William Darcy was a lost cause. No need to ruin it for anyone else. Perhaps Richard was a viable option. Not as rich, but a nice man and not bad looking. Could be worth looking into. 

“I think I need to be off,” Caroline announced. “Would anyone care to drive me?” Charlie and John looked at the clock and realised they had a couples cooking class in an hour and a half, and had to be off too. They would take her. “Here’s my number, Elizabeth. Call me next time you’re in town and we’ll get you measured. It was lovely meeting you, under other circumstances I would have liked to know you more intimately…” She winked and turned to leave. John kissed his sister on the cheek, so did Charlie, and they all left. Lizzie was left with Will. 

 

“You two became fast friends I see.” He commented. 

“Yes, aside from her wanting to shag me, sure.” Lizzie smiled and stood. “Coming?” 

That left him a little speechless. “Did she say that?”

“Yes, you heard her. She wants to know me more intimately. Honestly, do you not speak innuendo? And the whole sexuality thing was only to see if she could have a shot or not. But I like her, she is certainly not insane, but she does have intentions towards you that are not pure.” 

“I can see now why John looked so bewildered. Witnessing whatever conversation you two had must have been a real challenge.” 

“Aw, you look just as bewildered. It’s cute.” She reached up and stroked his cheek as she said it. A second later she realised what she had done, but pretended like it was nothing. She was becoming too familiar with him. It had quickly made her less cautious and thus, less conscious of what she was doing. 

They reached the car and Lizzie remembered that she was supposed to be mad about the thing with John. But somehow, Will felt the change in her demeanour and quickly stopped her. “When we get home, remember? We need to stop at the grocery store first. I was thinking of making home made pizza on the grill.” 

Lizzie had silently complained to herself that they never did anything ordinary together, and now she got her wish. She knew that all people had to shop for food, but she had never imagined how William Darcy would look pushing a shopping trolley. He manoeuvred it with ease through the supermarket, putting this and that into it. When they reached the end where the crisps and the candy were, he stopped. “I don’t know what kind of crisps you like.” He said it like it had been terribly remiss of him to not have found this out earlier.

“Mostly I just go for grill, or salty. I have been told it is my most ordinary preference.” 

“I like them too. But Gigi has terrible taste; she always gets every new experimental kind. Usually horrible.” 

“Alright, so ordinary boring for us, horrible for Gigi, sounds fair.” 

“Candy?” He asked.

“I would, but candy and crisps seem like a bit of an over-indulgence. You kind of gave me a complex this morning.”

“What?”

“You know exactly what I mean, what with your whole…” She gestured at him.

“My whole…what?” This was interesting. And it was funny to see her squirm a little. 

“Don’t make me say it.”

“I will make you say it.” 

“The whole Greek god statue thing you’ve got going on under there. It’s complex inducing.” 

“Is it? I’m sorry. I’ll stay fully clothed from now on.” He laughed and pushed the trolley towards check-out. 

“It’s not funny!”

“Correction, it is very funny. Take these…” he handed her the car keys, “I can’t open the car with my hands full.”

“Can I drive?”

“Uh, sure. Do you know the way?” 

“Yes, I promise I won’t wreck it.” 

“I have no doubt in your abilities.” The car was a Tesla model S, and she would never be able to afford one on her own. She had to take the chance. 

Will was very quiet during the ride back to the house. She didn’t know if it was because he was holding his breath or something else. But he visibly relaxed when they pulled into the driveway. 

She extracted the key and handed it over. “Thanks, that was fun!” 

“Yeah…fun.” She drives like a car-thief and a rally-driver jammed into one. He couldn’t help it, it was hot as fuck. 

 

They unpacked and while Lizzie went to see if Gigi was awake, he began prepping the pizza. When she came back down, she sat on a chair in the kitchen and watched. 

“We’re back at the house now.” She said. 

“I am aware of that.”

“So, explain.”

“Can’t we just drop it? He’s happy, Charlie’s happy, I’m not unhappy. It’s all good. Can we leave it at that?” 

“Caroline told me something, about the sort of people you guys hang out with.” 

“Oh?”

“They are bigots, the lot of them.” 

“Many still are; they are stuck in the past.”

“Is that something that will affect John badly, working with you and being with Charlie?”

“No, I don’t think so. You’ve seen Charlie, does he seem affected?”

“No, but I don’t know him all that well.” 

“But I do, and while he does not like it, he is not affected by it. I think the attitude is changing. But Caroline is probably more affected, being a woman. The idea of two women is not as common in our circles as two men, not yet. It’s probably deep rooted sexism, but I can see why she would have a bigger problem. I think most people hide it if they are anything but straight, to avoid issues. But Caroline sees an issue and has to be up in its face.”

“Isn’t that a good quality to have? To challenge old norms?”

“It is. I am only relaying what I have observed. That is the reason she might feel it more than Charlie does.”

“I like her. I can’t believe you were so harsh when you talked about her.” 

“You and I are different people. She has different goals when it comes to associating with us, and thus, a different approach.” 

“I think she made it pretty clear she wants to get in both our pants. I have to say I would have a hard time saying no if she really offered.”

Will sighed and turned around so he faced her, leaving the pizza be. “I don’t want to hear that.” He looked at her seriously. 

“Prude.” She laughed. 

“No. It has nothing to do with you two being women. It has to do with how I feel about you, and I don’t need you throwing someone else in my face.” 

“What are you talking about?” 

“The way I feel about you has not changed and I doubt that it will change for a very long time.” He had completely abandoned the pizza now. Instead he was coming closer, leaning towards her and putting one hand on the table on either side of her. She was still sitting on one of the kitchen chairs. 

“I realise that we have suffered from a lot of miscommunication, so let me make things abundantly clear once and for all. I want you, body and soul. I want to be in a relationship with you. I want you to love me. I want to call you mine.” Richard might kill him for this, but he felt reasonably sure he could take Richard in a fight. “I want mornings like this morning, together in this kitchen. I want afternoons like this one. I want them with you.” He stared into her eyes, waiting for a response. Maybe he had come on too strong, laying all the cards on the table. But he couldn’t take more of the misunderstandings. “If for some reason I can’t have it all, tell me what I can have, if anything. If you do not want me in your life as anything other than Gigi’s brother, tell me. I need to know where we stand with each other.” 

That was some declaration. “I need to think about this.” She put a hand tentatively on his chest, then moved it up over his shoulder and neck. She found support there and leaned forward to kiss him lightly on the lips. “I can not and will not deny the attraction.” She said when she pulled back. “There is just so much else. I thought you had moved on.” 

“From you? Never. I can’t say that I haven’t looked at another woman since you left, but no one has stuck with me the way you do.” He had tried to forget her. He had tried to replace her. Nothing had worked. 

She did not know about any of the other women he had been seeing. She had no right to, but she was a little jealous. “You did tell me you had moved on.”

“I hadn’t planned to make this kind of declaration to you. I was supposed to stay away and do nothing, but I can’t do that when I have you here. It’s impossible. I need you to tell me yes or no. Anyone else is in the past.” 

“I think I need to go for a walk. I need to think.” Before he could protest, she put a finger to his lips. “It is not the middle of the night; it is the middle of the sunny afternoon. I will be fine.”

“I’ll be here.” He stood straight, releasing her from the cage that had been his body. 

She stood to walk out, but paused for a moment. “How long have you felt like this?”

“An attraction, like I said, from the moment we met. But love? I can’t be sure. It was all over me before I knew it had begun.” 

“At the gala?” “Definitely.” “On the night of my graduation?” “Perhaps, somewhere around there.”

“There is something we have never talked about.” She said. 

“There are many things we have never talked about.”

“The age difference.” 

“Ah. Is it a problem for you? We are both consenting adults after all.” Was she trying to find a new problem now?

“The problem is that I don’t even know how old you are.” 

“So, we’re at that stage. I am thirty-four, you are twenty-six. Eight years.”

“Oh, right. Well, not too bad. It wouldn’t give my father a heart-attack.”

“Just out of curiosity, how old did you think I was?”

“I don’t know, I haven’t really thought about it until now. It just struck me that I didn’t know.” 

“Do you realise that this is the first time we have actually talked about us without it being some sort of fight?” 

“Oh I think it still has the potential to turn into a fight. Hence why I need to take a walk and clear some things up in my head.” 

“You might want to think about this then; I am going to ask you to move back to London. It doesn’t have to be into my house, but into this city. Just so you know.” 

“Yep, definitely the potential for a fight…” She muttered and went outside.


	19. Can I go the distance?

Lizzie walked for an hour along the Thames, then for another hour back again. He had certainly made it clear, once and for all, how he felt about things. So she had been wrong during most of their acquaintance, wrong about him changing his mind about her. He had been constant or even growing in his affections for her. Gigi had been right too. That was going to make her so smug. 

What about her own feelings about him? Was she attracted to him? Yes. Would she like to sleep with him? Definitely. Did she want a relationship? Not sure. It was certainly bad timing. Things at work could not be worse, and she couldn’t just up and leave. Also she really liked her cottage, even if the village was a bit too sleepy. She felt that London was too busy, too hectic. She’d had so many years of that already. 

Did she want mornings in the kitchen with him, making toast and sharing their lives? Yes, the thought did appeal to her. How he made her feel just by looking at her was insane. The feeling she got if he happened to brush against her was electric. His body was fantastic. His mind was as well. But did she trust him? She did not know. She had no doubt that he would never do anything to hurt her, but his moral compass was compromised nonetheless. Physical attraction can not last in the long haul, there needs to be love, trust and friendship as well.

They might develop all those things, but she could not uproot her new life without it. If things did not turn out well, she would have burned the bridge to a life in Meryton. She would be stuck in a city that contained him, working a job with his sister and cousin. Not to mention the current connection through John. If she stayed in Meryton, they would never be able to have anything more than the occasional night together. Lizzie did not believe in long distance relationships and Will Darcy was not the man to try it with. 

Suddenly she found herself back outside his house. He would expect some sort of answer when she entered. She did not have one. 

She found him on the couch in the living room, working on his laptop. He did not look up. “You took your sweet time.” 

He was not happy, that much was certain. Perhaps he had thought she would be gone for twenty minutes and come back and throw herself in his arms. If that was the case, he was sorely mistaken. 

She walked over to him and sat down in an armchair to the left of him, at the head of the coffee table. She leaned forward and rested her forearms on her thighs. 

“Would you mind closing your laptop for a second?” She asked. 

“Do I want to hear this?” He looked at her, his eyes serious. But she could see the worry behind them. 

“Maybe not, but you will hear it.” So he closed his laptop. Lizzie related all the things she had thought about and how she felt about them. Every thought, question and insecurity she had about any kind of potential outcome. He seemed to react the strongest when she told him that she did not trust him enough. But he said nothing and waited for her to finish. 

“You seem to have thought about every way this can not work.” 

“I want to be honest with you. Yes, we can go to bed together right now. I don’t have a problem with that, I would even love it. But I am thinking about you. How you would feel afterwards. I think it might make things worse for you.” 

“You’re saying we can sleep together but tomorrow you will go home and not come back.” 

“Yes. As things are now, that is what would happen. I can not come back on a permanent basis. I can visit you and you can visit me, but it would not be a relationship.”

“I have never felt this powerless.” He admitted. “I told myself that you would come back, that you would hate it in Meryton and be back in no time. That you would have forgiven me and give me a chance. I also knew that was unfeasible. But this…it is hopeless.” 

“William…” She reached out for him, but he leaned back on the couch and out of her reach. If he closed himself off like this they would never be able to settle on anything. So she got up and moved to sit next to him instead. She laid her left hand on his cheek and turned his head towards her. “I hate to hurt you in this way. I don’t want it to be like this.” 

“What do you want then? All you’ve said is what you don’t want and what you can’t do.” 

She sat back. “If you are alright with it, I would like us to keep talking, texting, anything. See each other when possible. Keep an open and honest communication. The way I see it, it is the only way to actually get to know each other. It still wouldn’t be a relationship, but it could lay the foundation for one.”

“It would drive me insane.” He looked her in the eyes. “Talking to you but having to go I don’t know how long without being near you. It would be torture. At least when I had no contact with you I could forget about you. This would be a constant reminder of what I can’t have.” 

“I don’t see any other way. I just don’t know you well enough to uproot my life and chance it. Attraction and lust is not enough to build a relationship on.” 

“If you hadn’t moved away, this wouldn’t even be a problem. The problem is that neither of us have four hours to spend on a round trip during the week.”

“If I hadn’t moved away, would we ever have gotten to the point where we can talk like this?” 

“Yes, I think so. I would have confronted you with this a lot sooner. I would hope that my expulsion from your life would have been lifted after not too long.” 

“And if Gigi had not gotten sick? What then?” 

He paused a little, looking like he was thinking about if he should say what he was about to say. “I had this fantasy where I made her invite you to the family estate, and ambush you with it there.” He just remembered that he hadn’t even tried to play the Pemberley-card. 

“The what?”

“The family estate. It’s only me and Gigi now, of course, but it is our ancestral home. Pemberley, in Kent.”

“An actual estate? Like with grounds and horses and things?”

“Just like that.” 

“Just when I thought I had you pegged, you go and up the ante.” 

“I should hate to be predictable.” He grinned. 

“Can I just ask, out of curiosity, how rich are you? A ballpark figure, or just how many figures are we talking?”

“You are starting to sound like Caroline.” He teased. 

“You know that’s not why I’m asking. It just feels like a piece in the puzzle I’m trying to put together. And you know my net worth after all.” 

“What, still 400 pounds?” He was on fire with the teasing now. 

“Might be in the four figure department now, but it is certainly not close to you.” 

“I think it is somewhere over 70 million, last I checked at least. In liquid assets, that is. Then there is this house, Pemberley, my office building, a house in Rome…” 

“You…oh…well.” Big puzzle-piece. Huge. Enormous. 

“Have you never googled me?”

“I have, but I had a different focus, I tried to find dirt on you.” 

“Did you?”

“No, nothing solid.” Gossip didn’t count. 

“Good.”

“I still know there is dirt you know, it just isn’t in the public eye.” 

“Is that what really bothers you?”

“I don’t know. It bothers me, but I don’t think it would be enough to keep me from you, on its own.” 

Lizzie sighed deeply and curled up beside him, leaning her head sideways on his shoulder. She felt so much more at ease with him now than she ever had with anyone else. It would be a hard thing to let go. He put an arm around her and drew her closer, and they both just sat like that quietly for a while, contemplating their situation. Just then Gigi walked into the living room. They hadn’t heard her come down the stairs. 

“You guys are looking cosy.” She commented. They looked up but did not part. “I heard arguing again.” 

“Not arguing...” Lizzie began. “…just discussing, right?” Gigi filled in. 

“Something like that.” Will said. 

“So, is there something you both would like to tell me?” 

“No, I don’t think so. I’m going to finish the pizza, now that you’re up.” Will said, standing and walking out of the room. Lizzie felt the loss of him too acutely. 

“I heard earlier that he told you about the past year, that he tried to get over you. Don’t hold it against him, please. He only tried to be happy.”

“I don’t hold it against him. I have not spent the year as a nun either. Things are just very complicated and I need more before I make some drastic decision about anything.”

“But you feel something for him, don’t you?”

“Yes I do.” More and more every second. 

“Will you stay in touch with him after you go home?”

“That is up to him. I would like to, but it might be too hard for him when the outcome is so uncertain.” 

“I love you for trying, for not just writing him off.” 

“I couldn’t if I tried. I have never met someone like him before, someone who affects me so.” It was the strangest thing. A year earlier she had managed to keep him away, but not anymore. 

“I will do my best to encourage him even if it hurts him, I think it will pay off in the end.”

“Well, you have thought so ever since we met, why stop now?” Lizzie smiled and nudged her friend. “How about some TV while we wait for the pizza, huh?”

“God, yes.”


	20. Hands of gold are always cold but a womans hands are warm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lemonade

The three of them spent the early evening eating pizza and watching TV. Gigi went to bed around eight, thinking that leaving them to each other as much as possible would speed things up. Lizzie sat at the end of the sofa under a soft blanket, scrolling through Netflix to find a decent movie. Gigi had been sitting next to her before going upstairs and Will was in the cellar getting a bottle of wine, so she stretched out on the sofa and nicked another cushion from Will’s armchair. 

“Comfy?” Will stood in the doorway holding a bottle and two wine glasses. He had rolled up the sleeves of his shirt, exposing his forearms. 

“Yes.” She drew her legs up a bit and indicated to the place next to her. “Are you just going to stand there all night?”

How had he gotten here? A year and a half ago he didn’t care about any woman he met, except his sister. He supposed he cared about Caroline a little too, being Charlie’s sister, but that was it. A roller coaster later he had this lovely girl in his home and he was at his wits end about what to do with her. He walked over and sat down next to her, uncorking the wine and pouring two glasses. She sat up straight and took her glass, clinking it together with his. “Thank you for being here. No matter what happens between us, I am glad Gigi has you.” He smiled and kissed her on the cheek. Lizzie put her glass down on the table and turned to face him properly. “Kiss me.” She looked him in the eyes and waited. He put his own glass down, but did not obey. 

“There might be a risk of me refusing to drive you home tomorrow if we do this.” He said, his tone both serious and teasing. 

“It’s a risk I am willing to take.” She put a hand on his chest, playing with the buttons of his shirt. 

“I am serious Elizabeth.”

“Going to keep me prisoner here are you?” Her voice had turned low and husky, and she had begun to unbutton his shirt now. 

“Don’t tempt me.” He put both his hands around the back of her neck and held her there for a moment, looking into her eyes. “You are so beautiful.” The kiss was slow and soft, but he built pressure as he wrapped one arm around her to pull her closer to him. 

Lizzie took it as a sign that he was on board with this and swung one leg over his so that she was straddling his legs, facing him. “Do you want this, us, tonight?” She asked. 

“More than you know.” He claimed her lips again, but took over control as he lifted her and laid her down beneath him on the sofa. “I have never wanted anything more.” His shirt was halfway unbuttoned but still tucked into his trousers. He undid a clasp behind her neck and pulled the blouse she was wearing over her head. Underneath she wore a black lace bra that was fairly see-through. “Lovely” he whispered. They continued to strip each other of clothing until she was lying in silk underwear and the lace bra, and he was only in his boxers above her. 

“I didn’t think you could look hotter than you did this morning.” She whispered in his ear as she leaned up to kiss him. His hair was messed up again, but he wasn’t wearing the glasses. She supposed glasses would be very impractical for the kind of activities they had in mind. “We should move upstairs.”

“We should,” he answered and stood from the sofa. A second later he bent back down and picked her up in his arms. 

“Hey!” He hit him with her fist on his chest. “What are you, a caveman?”

“I might be. It’s all part of getting to know each other.” He grinned and carried her upstairs with an ease that was a little shocking. Those morning workouts seemed to be doing the job. He pushed the door to the master bedroom open with his foot and deposited her on the bed very carefully. “Stay there.” He told her, and got up to close the door. 

“You seem to think you can do as you like.”

“I am used to getting my way…” He climbed on top of her and kissed her, pressing her down into the soft covers. 

She groaned, part pleasure part annoyance at his arrogance. “I have my work cut out with you, that much is clear.” 

“I am willing to give you all the time you need to do that.” He teased and reached behind her to unhook the clasp at her back. His mouth worked its way slowly down her neck, chest, stomach, only stopping when he reached the silk underwear she still had on. “These need to go…” He muttered and hooked a finger on each side of her hips and pulled them slowly down her legs, caressing the sensitive inside of her thighs as he went. She squirmed at the touch, she was very ticklish in that particular area. When she was completely exposed, he came back up to her face, looking into her eyes with an intensity she hadn’t expected. “So beautiful, my darling…” He whispered and kissed her with a fervour she longed for the moment he stopped. 

While his lips were occupied with her lips, her neck, her breasts, one of his hands was making its way further down. She gasped as he reached his goal, and bit her lower lip as he began stroking her. “William…please…”

“Yes, my darling?” He smiled wickedly down at her, his other hand holding the back of her head to steer her mouth to his. 

“Please…” The endearment warmed her, loathe as she was to admit it. Her body screamed at her with need for him. Her hands were busy exploring his neck, chest, back, hips, but it wasn’t enough. 

“Please what?” He asked innocently, momentarily pausing his ministrations and plunging one finger, then two and three inside her. He moved them with a steady rhythm and felt her breath hitch with every turn. 

“Take me, please, I need you inside me now!” Her need was too great to be denied much longer. She wanted it all, but there was still one obstacle. Without warning, she pushed at his chest with all her power, pushing him off of her to the side. She followed in the motion and had effectively switched their roles. “You are still clothed.” Without asking, she copied his manoeuvre from earlier and removed his last piece of clothing. She was by no means inexperienced with men, but she did not remember the last few men she had taken to bed to have his gifts. She made quick work of rolling a condom on him before beginning to tease him with her mouth. She would enjoy this, she would enjoy him. She had calmed a little since he stopped touching her like that and could focus on him for a little while. 

“God woman, what are you doing to me?” He sighed as pressure built inside him. He half sat up and grabbed her by the shoulders, forcibly pulling her up to his face to kiss her, then half threw her down on the covers beside him, holding her there, staring down at her from above. “Are you ready?” 

“Yes!” She breathed and sucked in air as he slowly entered her. “Yes...”

He kept his eyes on her, watching for a change, for her to change her mind, but she didn’t. 

Some time later in the early hours of the morning, William Darcy lay awake in his bed and watched the clear night sky outside his windows. Lizzie was soundly asleep beside him. She lay on her stomach spread out over practically the middle of the bed. One of her arms was draped over his chest with her hand almost clasping his shoulder. He could not sleep. The next night he would be alone in this very bed, for however long. She would be a couple of hours away, back in her new life. He did not delude himself by thinking she would change her mind because they spent one night together. It was an amazing night, but she was determined to see through what she had started and that meant staying in Meryton, at least for now. 

Later that morning he woke alone. The clock read 08:23, the doctor wouldn’t be there for another hour and a half. Plenty of time…plenty of time to contemplate that as soon as the doctor was finished with Gigi, Lizzie would want to leave. He wondered where she was. Had she gone back to her room at some point, or was she downstairs? 

He walked down to the kitchen and found her in the same chair she had occupied the morning before. She was reading something on his iPad and absentmindedly made mush of her cereal. She didn’t seem to note his presence at first, but then he opened the refrigerator, making that sound that refrigerator doors make, and she looked up. 

“Good morning William.” She said and smiled. He wasn’t sure why she suddenly began called him William. In fact, before this weekend she had mainly called him Darcy. Then, starting this Friday, it had been Will. Now it was William. 

“Good morning Elizabeth.” He took out a bottle of juice and placed it on the table. He put both hands on the table and leaned on them, facing in her direction. She had begun to unlock the iPad again, but put it down when she noticed his attention. 

“Don’t look so grim.” She told him and smiled. 

“I had hoped to wake up next to you.” He stated. 

Had he been afraid that she had left? Was that why he was in this mood again?

“I only got up about half an hour ago, but I’ve been half awake about an hour more. You were sleeping like a rock; I didn’t want to risk waking you with my stirring.” 

“I would have loved to be woken up by you.” He rounded the table and came closer to her. 

“Alright, next time I will wake you at seven in the morning on a Sunday. And I will remind you then that it was you who wanted me to wake you.” 

He was happy that she assumed there would be a next time. He wondered when though, a week from now? A month? He went to stand behind her and swept her hair over one shoulder, leaving one side of her neck exposed. He leaned down to kiss it, keeping both hands on her shoulders, lightly massaging. She closed her eyes and leaned back against his chest. She felt so comfortable against him. He was a steady rock in her life that she hadn’t known she was missing. She turned around on the chair and kissed him, drawing him down to her. One of his hands began to wander, caressing her breast through the shirt she was wearing. His hand kept going down and he slipped his fingers underneath her silky panties. He dipped two fingers into her, almost making her lift into the air with pleasure. Once his fingers were slick, he began massaging her core and she lost it. She leaned back against the edge of the table for some support and craned her neck back. It was more than she could take. He varied the pressure and slipped his fingers inside her now and again. He grew more and more impatient with her moans and suddenly took hold of the shorts she was wearing and slid them off her along with the panties. He let her go for a moment, opening his trousers to release himself. He then stood her up, so that she leaned against the table and entered her from behind. He kept one arm around her middle to steady her, the other on her hip to keep her where he wanted her. She supported herself on the table and suddenly the arm around her vanished and moved down again, continuing to massage her. It was too much. He pumped into her at a continuingly faster pace while the pleasure from her core threatened to overcome her at any moment. She could feel him upping the pace even more, perhaps he was close himself. A second later things went both light and dark as intense pleasure washed over her. He continued to pump into her a few more times, now he held on to her hips, then he collapsed at her back, steadying himself against the table and around her. 

“Wow…you…damn…” Lizzie couldn’t formulate a sentence yet, but she really wanted to express some amazement. 

“Wow yourself.” He turned her to face him and righted their clothing again. “Now that is a good morning, my darling.” He smiled and caressed her cheek, placing a light kiss on her lips.

“You are just full of surprises, aren’t you?” She laughed a little. “I need a shower now.” 

“Go ahead, I’m going down to the gym first.” But before she could leave, he took hold of her arm and silently asked her to come back. As she did, he leaned down slightly and kissed her again, slow but intense. 

 

When both of them were righted again, Will found Lizzie in the sofa in the living room, reading a book. He sat down next to her and stretched his legs out in front of him, sighing with contentment. 

“The doctor will be here soon.” He commented. 

“Good.” 

“When do you want to go home?”

She looked up from the book at the question. “I don’t. But I have to, tonight at the latest.” 

“I don’t want you to go either.”

“I gathered as much.” She grinned at him. 

“Can’t you just quit? Just call your uncle and quit. You’ve got a better job here anyway.” 

“It would be bad form to just up and quit in the middle of a crisis.” 

“Bad form, huh?” 

“Yep.” 

“Deep down you are way more posh than I am.” 

“I am not, you take that back mister.” She poked him in the chest. “My moral compass is better than yours though.” 

“Imagine how posh our kids would be.” He teased. “With a well balanced moral compass.” 

“Hey now! One step at a time.” 

“I have a limited amount of patience for this kind of thing.” 

“What kind of thing?”

“I think we both know that we will be together at some point in the future. I don’t see the point in delaying the inevitable.” 

“It is to make sure that our relationship consists of more than lust and angry passion. Also, as I’ve said, I can’t quit my job just like that.” 

“I never believed in long distance.” He commented. 

“No, me neither. Trying to make this a long distance relationship won’t work. We should try to see each other as often as possible, but it can’t be a relationship.”

“You know, the only thing I hear when you say that is that you want freedom to see other people.”

“Make of it what you like. The point is that we both are sure of what we want, whatever it means to reach that point.” 

Just then, the doorbell rang.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My Mac is back in business, and since NOTHING works on this bloody thing I had to post everything I had written here before switching back to writing on the Mac. Hence, this.


	21. If I loved you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs:   
> If I loved you - Delta Rae feat. Lindsey Buckingham  
> Damn it I'm in love again - Honey Ryder

After a quick talk with the doctor where Will and Lizzie described the issues Gigi has with doctors, Dr. Fairfax asked to go up to her alone. Lizzie went back to the sofa and picked her book back up. After a little while Will came after her. 

“Are we arguing again?” He asked. 

“No, you are arguing. I just laid out the facts. You are the one making demands I can’t meet.” She didn’t look up. 

“And I am just supposed to wait around for you to figure things out?”

“I make no such demands. If you want this, I am asking you to give me the time I need to be sure of what I want.” 

“And how much time will you need, exactly?”

“I don’t know that yet. I feel like we’ve had this conversation already. We’re not going to reach a different conclusion this time.” 

“You are so infuriating!” He growled. 

“See, you are already figuring out things about me, good job.” She said sarcastically. 

“Do not sass me woman.” 

“I will sass you, you desperately need to be sassed.” 

“Oh I do, do I?”

“Yes. You are much too serious all the time. You need to lighten up.” 

“Lighten up.” He half sat down on the sofa and took the book from her hands. “I’ll give you lighten up.” She saw a dangerous glint in his eyes the second before he attacked her. She screamed and tried to scramble out of the way, but he blocked her way. “No, god stop, Will!!”

“This will teach you to not tell me I need to lighten up.” 

His tickle-attack continued until Lizzie could hardly draw a proper breath, “Will…!! Stop oh god…!” She laughed so hard. 

“Say what? Who needs to lighten up?”

“No one, god damnit no one!” She squirmed under him. He let up and sat back, letting her right herself again. “You bastard.” She laid back over the armrest, half out of the sofa, trying to catch her breath. 

He looked too pleased with himself. “I love you too.” He took her hand and pulled her up so they sat face to face on the sofa. He kissed her on the cheek and smiled, “you are so cute when you are all messed up.” 

That was how Dr. Fairfax found them when she came down from the second floor. Lizzie tried to straighten herself out a little, but Will looked just as impeccable as he had before. He got up and walked out to talk with the doctor. 

Dr Fairfax confirmed what they had thought all along, Gigi had pneumonia. The doctor prescribed antibiotics and told Will that her bill would be in the post. 

Lizzie spent most of the rest of the day with Gigi. Doctor Fairfax had told them that Gigi needed to make a few laps around the garden each day and not just stay in bed. And so, Lizzie forced the other woman up and out. After that they spent a while talking and making plans for Gigi to come visit Meryton when she was feeling better. 

“I am really surprised that you and Caroline hit it off so well.”

“Don’t you like her either? I admit she has a very honest and practical approach to dealing with people, but she’s cool. She knows what she wants out of life.” 

“Yes. Will.” 

“Oh come on. She isn’t serious about that.” 

“Perhaps not, but I can’t much like someone who has made it clear she only wants my brother for his money.”

“Well I like her. I intend for us to become friends in the future.” 

“Good luck with that.”

“Your brother has poisoned you against her. I assure you, she would surprise you.” 

“You’ve met her once! I’ve grown up with her.” 

“I am an excellent judge of character.”

“You really aren’t.” Gigi started pointing out the people Lizzie had misjudged in the past two years.

“Alright fine, but you are wrong about this.” 

“We shall agree to disagree.”

“You are a little clone of your brother.” 

“I take that as a compliment.” 

 

Around four in the afternoon, Gigi was too tired to stay awake any longer. They said goodbye for now and Gigi went upstairs. Lizzie supposed it was time for her to go home. It would take a couple of hours after all, and she had a couple of things to get ready for the coming week. Will sensed her feelings, “is it time?”

“Yes.”

“Alright.” He held out her jacket for her, then took the car keys and the bag she had packed out to the car. She got in the passenger seat and waited for him to get into the car. Neither one of them said much for most of the ride. When there was maybe twenty minutes left, she broke the silence.

“You act like someone died. The mood swings are hard to keep up with.”

“I will miss you.”

“Well, I will miss you too, but it’s not forever. And you can text me like, every day.”

“No, you would find that smothering. Not that I don’t want to.” 

“Well, how about we just take things one day at a time huh?”

“Yes, not much else for it I think.” 

“Are you going to depress me like this every time we will have to say goodbye to each other?”

“Probably.” He winked at her, but she could see he was unhappy. 

“Alright, just asking.”

A little while later they arrived outside her cottage. Before she could say anything, Will had unhooked his seatbelt and got out of the car. 

“Ookay…” She said to herself and did the same. He had gotten her bag out of the back seat when she was out of the car.

“Ladies first,” he said and gestured towards her front door. She walked ahead of him and unlocked the door and turned on the light in the hallway. 

“I imagine this will become another issue for us.” He said. 

“What?”

“You wanting to live like this, and how I live.” 

She smiled up at him. “One problem at a time darling.”

“Now, that is my term of endearment for you, you can’t just up and steal it.”

“Can, did. What are you going to do about it?” 

“Nothing, absolutely nothing.” He stepped closer, cupping both hands around the back of her neck and kissing her very thoroughly. She let both her arms make their way around his chest, finding leverage against his upper back. After a little while they just stood there holding each other. 

“I like you, you know. Like, like you. A lot.” She said, her face half buried in his chest. “I also like how solid you are.” He tightened his hold on her a little, and she sighed. “I don’t want you to go.”

No sentence had ever made him happier to hear. 

“But I have to. I will talk to you tomorrow, if you want.” 

“I do.”

“Good.” 

A little while later he got back into his car and drove back to the city. Lizzie suddenly wondered if staying in Meryton was really worth it. Up until now it had been clear that she had to see this chapter of her life through, but now, she really didn’t want to. 

 

10:43 Text from William Darcy: I don’t like how this whole waking up alone is a thing.

11:02 Text from Lizzie: I know, I miss your snoring already.

11:03 Text from William Darcy: I do NOT snore. 

11:34 Text from Lizzie: You will never know, will you? ;)

11:40 Text from William Darcy: I’ve changed my mind, I will marry Caroline. She would never insult me like this. 

11:42 Text from Lizzie: You wouldn’t dare.

11:55 Text from William Darcy: Try me. 

12:06 Text from Lizzie: Fine, you don’t snore. 

12:07 Text from William Darcy: Better. Now, how are you today my darling? 

14:46 Text from Lizzie: Sorry, lunch meeting ran long. Meetings longer than 20 minutes should be banned. That’s how I am. How are you?

14:48 Incoming Call from William Darcy. Lizzie looked at the display for a moment before answering. 

“Hi.” She collapsed in her office chair and turned so her back was turned to the door. 

“Bad day?” 

“Yeah…” She sighed. “I wish I had just stayed with you.” 

“You have things you need to do. I’m sure you are kicking ass even if it is hard right now.”

“I wish. My uncle seems to think that everything I and the rest of the team do now is wrong. It’s like a collective trust issue.” 

“Doesn’t sound like a good work environment.”

“No. It isn’t at the moment.” 

“Anything I can do?”

“No, this is plenty. It reminds me that the goings on inside these walls isn’t the entire world.”

“It very much isn’t. I haven’t even begun showing you the world yet.”

A colleague knocked on her door and indicated that they had to have another meeting. God damn it. 

“I have to go, another meeting at three.” 

“Alright, I’ll talk to you later. Goodbye my darling.”

“Goodbye William.”

 

18:55 Text from Lizzie: Finally home. It’s weird how much I miss you. I haven’t even thought that much about you for a year, and now…

19:02 Text from William Darcy: I miss you too. Perhaps it will give you an understanding of how life has been for me for the past two years. 

Grumpy, Lizzie thought. 

19:10 Text from Lizzie: You dug that grave all by your lonesome. You had the option to be nice from the beginning. I can’t help it if you chose to be an ass. 

19:15 Text from William Darcy: Watch it Green Eyes, I can throw you over for Caroline at any moment. 

19:19 Text from Lizzie: Truth stings, huh?

19:21 Text from William Darcy: Yes. Luckily you are so open minded that you can see past my arseholery. 

19:25 Text from Lizzie: Was that sarcasm?

19:26 Text from William Darcy: I don’t know what you mean. 

19:32 Text from Lizzie: One day, William Darcy, I will have you figured out.

19:34 Text from William Darcy: I can hardly wait. 

 

Sassy mother fucker…

 

14:52 Text from Lizzie: It is strange to have gone a year of complete radio silence to not wanting to go a day without hearing from you. 

15:54 Text from William Darcy: Clingy. 

16:07 Text from Lizzie: How is it that you can be so sassy and sarcastic over text but not in real life?

16:09 Text from William Darcy: I get time to think about it over text. #sociallyawkward

16:12 Text from Lizzie: I think I might keel over. I have now print screened your hashtag and will proceed to send it to all the people we both know. 

16:13 Text from William Darcy: You wouldn’t dare. What happens in texts stays in texts. 

16:15 Text from Lizzie: I don’t know, it could come in useful someday. #blackmail

16:16 Text from William Darcy: You devious little minx. 

16:32 Text from Lizzie: I have now recovered from laughing so hard I fell over. #minx

 

 

13:15 Text from Lizzie: Can you come here this weekend?

13:33 Text from William Darcy: Maybe. I might be able to shuffle some things around and get there Saturday evening. Friday is this dinner thing and I thought perhaps you wouldn’t want to go public yet. 

13:39 Text from Lizzie: Going stag?

13:41 Text from William Darcy: No. 

13:53 Text from Lizzie: …?

13:55 Text from William Darcy: Caroline. 

14:01 Text from Lizzie: Ah, say hi from me. ;) 

14:09 Text from William Darcy: Sure. 

 

Friday afternoon

 

Text from unknown number: You’re not mad I’m going with Wills to this thing tonight are you?

Ah, Caroline. 

Text from Elizabeth Bennet: No, why would I? You two have fun. 

Text from Caroline Bingley: No reason, it just seemed like you two are a thing now and in the spirit of friendship I thought I’d ask. 

Text from Elizabeth Bennet: Thanks, but he can do what he likes. 

Text from Caroline Bingley: Does that mean he can do who he likes too?

Text from Elizabeth Bennet: Yes.

 

18:09 Text from William Darcy: I can do who I like, can I?

18:22 Text from Lizzie: Yes. And who you like to do is me. 

18:25 Text from William Darcy: Can’t argue with that. 

18:30 Text from Lizzie: I thought not. But in the spirit of our agreement, you actually CAN do who you like. Just FYI. 

18:33 Text from William Darcy: Ignoring that. I should be able to get there around six tomorrow evening, good?

18:35 Text from Lizzie: Good. 

 

Around six the next evening.

Lizzie heard a knock on her door. She was lying on her sofa watching a comedy show on Netflix, trying to distract herself from what would happen that evening. All her contact with William Darcy had been intense and confusing. Last weekend had been little different, but with one significant change. He had made it crystal clear what he wanted from her, and somehow that had dislodged any resistance she had in giving in to her want for him. It hadn’t, however, made her feel any surer about what kind of relationship they could have. She was pretty sure he would ask her questions about it every time they would see each other. This evening, she had no clearer answer than she’d had the previous weekend. 

Another knock took her from her reverie and brought her to the door. On the other side was the object of her thoughts for the past week. “William. You look very nice.” He was dressed in a dark grey three-piece suit with a burgundy tie. She was only wearing an oversized t-shirt and worn jeans. She could have done without the obvious contrast, but she had felt silly dressing up and she hadn’t imagined he would be so overdressed. 

“Business dinner. Are you going to invite me inside?” He smiled and let his eyes wander. He loved her like this, the way she was most comfortable as herself. It reminded him of the hoodie and jeans she’d worn when he’d ambushed her in class. Not his finest moment, but it gave him information he wanted, so clearly he was fine with it. 

“Yes of course, come in.” She felt stiff, awkward. He sat down on the bench in her hall and untied his shoes as she hung his jacket. He had brought a bottle of wine and as he took it out and showed it to her he asked her for a corkscrew. It made her move from where she had been frozen to the spot. She rolled her shoulders as she entered the kitchen, trying to relax a little. They had been around each other all last weekend, intimately. What was her brains problem now? As she was rooting around in a drawer trying to find the blasted corkscrew, he came up behind her as he liked to do and put his hands on her shoulders and ran them down her arms. It made her stop what she was doing and turn to face him. “Are you nervous about me being here?” He asked. He was in her safe space now, he knew that. But she had been fine being in his house, which, if anything, should have been the unnerving part. 

“Yes, I think I might be. I just know what you are going to ask and I don’t have an answer for you.” She looked mainly at her own bare feet. 

“Then I won’t ask, and you can relax. I thought you might be a bit mad about Caroline and the dinner party.”

“No, I know that’s nothing, and even if it was something it is your business.” She looked at him now, serious. 

“You are really adamant about the open option to see other people. Is there someone here, in Meryton, that I don’t know about?” 

“Well, not in any serious manner, but I have seen people. Rather recently before you made your appearance. And just as they are nothing for you to think about, Caroline is nothing for me to think about, at least not when it comes to you.”

“And since then?”

“What, in the last week? No, I have not seen anyone else in a romantic or other kind of horizontal way since last weekend.” She looked at him and put her hands on his chest, fiddling with his tie and lapels. “I don’t want an argument, not when I only have you for a night.” 

“Actually, I was thinking we might not…engage in any sort of overly physical activity tonight.” He proposed 

That was different. 

“Why?”

“We both know we have sexual chemistry to last a lifetime, but what you aren’t sure about is us without the passion and the want. We need to keep our hands to ourselves and try to move past this sort of honeymoon phase.” 

“How do you propose we manage that?”

“I don’t know if you have it, so I brought it just in case.” He opened the weekend bag he had brought and actually pulled out a game of Trivial pursuit. She was shell-shocked. 

“You know how to play Trivial pursuit?” 

“I do. I play it with Gigi, Charles and Richard all the time. I’ve even played with John and Caroline.”

“Well, I am all agog. This should be good!” 

And so, Lizzie set up the game while Will poured them a glass of wine each. As he set her glass down in front of her, she took a light hold of his now empty hand and silently asked him to lean down to kiss her. When he was just out of her reach, he whispered “if I begin kissing you now, I don’t know how hard it will be to stop.” 

“Let’s find out.” She whispered back, and closed the tiny gap between them. She remained seated while he stood leaning over her, and he managed to control himself enough to back away and sit on the other side of the table. 

“You can at least sit next to me.” 

“No, we are going to play this game until someone wins, without touching each other.”

“You are terrible at making the rules.” 

“It is you who insists on finding things out about us on some sort of psychological level.” 

“I’m regretting that more and more every second…” she muttered as he took off his suit jacket and rolled up the sleeves of his shirt. “Oh, come on.”

“What?” He asked, having no idea what it was she was complaining about now. 

“What are you even doing with your sleeves? Are you trying to kill me?” This had to be his plan, sexually frustrate her to the point of insanity and saying no. 

Ah, he had to admit that he had heard of this particular kink from other people, but since it to him was simply a matter of comfort, he did it anyway. “Not intentionally, no. I will not be uncomfortable just because you find me irresistible.” 

“No, it seems not.” Then the game began. After two hours Lizzie scored her final piece, having tried to stop Will from answering correctly in the middle for the last quarter of an hour. It was now a race to the finish line. Just then he managed to get back into the middle and answered correctly on the question about who coined the phrase about fifteen minutes of fame, with Andy Warhol. 

Will sat back in the kitchen sofa he occupied and sighed with contentment. “Finally.” 

“One might think you’re well educated.” She said and smiled. 

“One might think the same about you. Now, how about we put a movie on and just relax on the sofa?” 

“Oh, we’re allowed to touch again are we?”  
“Yes, two hours is all the restraint I can muster.” He stood and walked over to her, holding his hand out for her to take. 

“Thank goodness for that.” 

When they were comfortably seated and Will was flipping through Netflix (something that felt VERY familiar), Lizzie took courage. “I don’t know how to do this, what to do about us. I thought I would, but I really don’t.” 

He put down the remote and turned to her, brushing an errant strand of hair from her face. “It’s okay.” He kissed her lightly on the lips. 

“It’s just that I want to know. It annoys me how hard it is to make any kind of decision.”

“I’ve already given you my idea, so there isn’t a lot more I can contribute unless you present some kind of alternative.” Another kiss. 

“Could you…just say what you want again.” And stop making her feel befuddled. 

“It makes me sound like such a self-centred arsehole. But you have to know that’s not how I mean it. I don’t mean to sound like a cave man, alright?” 

“Yes, just lay it out for me one more time.” 

He looked hesitant, but then launched in to it. 

“I want you to move back to London, preferably in with me but you don’t have to, of course. I would like it if you took your job back with Richard and Gigi, but again, your choice. I want us to be in an exclusive relationship including no other people. I want to spend a lot of time with you.” He took a breath. “I would ask you to marry me but I have a feeling that wouldn’t go down well.” Though he did have a ring that had belonged to his mother. It would fit her perfectly. He had taken it out of storage recently had had it cleaned. Just in case. 

She took one of his hands. “Can I just lay out my issues with those things?”

“Yes.”

“The past week has made me pretty sure that I don’t want to stay at my uncle’s firm. I get the feeling he might just retire and sell it soon, but I don’t know what the time-frame is yet. If I don’t have a job here, I have no reason to stay in Meryton. I wouldn’t be able to support myself and even if I love living in the country, I couldn’t afford to stay. 

Issue one: I don’t particularly like London. It is crowded and the people are stressed out. I don’t want to live a stressed-out life. 

Issue two: I can’t be sure Richard would just have a position open to offer me. Which means I have to look for work elsewhere and I have no idea where I might end up.” 

She was quiet for a moment, choosing her words. 

“I won’t know where I would need to live, and as you know I don’t have any money. I can’t buy a place and the rental market is insane.” Another breath. “Living with you would make me dependent on you, and I am afraid it would become a whole thing…” 

He was about to say something but she stopped him. “And that last thing would make me no better than Caroline when I am not sure about us. And it is hard to know that you feel so strongly that you would marry me when I don’t even know how I feel.”

Will wanted to set her at ease and erase all her issues, but he wasn’t sure he could. “I wish I could tell you in a way that would make you understand that I can fix all those problems. If you loved me life would be so much easier, I’m not going to lie. But I can’t make that happen. You have to know that money is not a problem for me, I don’t care about money. I can buy you a flat anywhere in London or outside London. I could buy a house outside of London if you don’t want to live in the city. Let me help you with this.”

“I would be a kept woman. Do you have any idea what that would be like?” Humiliating.

“I can’t believe that even with the money I have, you won’t let me use it. It’s just money.”

“To you it is, but money is power. And having someone, even you, hold the kind of power over me that could put me out on the street if they so wished isn’t a prospect I much look forward to.” 

“I wouldn’t hold any power over you. Any place you lived in would be yours, I couldn’t do anything about that.” He wanted to say, what other option do you have? But of course, she didn’t have to take a job in London at all. A lot of people lived elsewhere and her only connection to the place was her brother, if he didn’t count himself. Siblings lived far apart all the time. The only reason she considered moving back was because of him. He was the reason she was putting herself through this. “I know you wouldn’t even consider doing this if it weren’t for me…and I love you for it, but please just let me do this for us. This isn’t just for you, if I got you to move back it would be for me, to make me happy. Entirely selfish.” 

She laughed at that last part. “Yes, offering to buy someone a place to live for several hundred thousand pounds is so selfish.”

“Not just someone, you.” He leaned closer again and kissed her, deeper this time, his right arm snaking around her back. “You’d be doing me a huge favour even. The wallet is getting a little on the heavy side.” He winked and kissed her again, but joking about that kind of money was not a luxury afforded to a lot of people. 

“What can I do to persuade you? Roll up my sleeves every time we’re together? Let you drive my Tesla? Get you your own Tesla? Yes! Moving present idea!” 

She had rarely seen him so acting so silly, it was heart-warming. “Alright, Peter Pan, we’ve had the difficult conversation now. I think we both need to think about this.”

“I really don’t.”

“Well, I do.”

“That’s fine, but I really don’t and I want you to know that.” He had never been surer about anything. The fact that she was so hesitant to take anything only showed her good character, but he needed to persuade her that it would be all right. 

“So…is sex still off the table or might you change your mind about that?” She asked, leaning over to kiss his neck, then continuing up to his mouth. 

“I have changed my mind, god I have…” With that, they once more forgot all about Netflix and retired to the bedroom.


End file.
